If You Are Not A Woman, You Will Never Understand

You are not a woman,
how could you see?

The panic from across the room in my eyes
as a drunken shadow approaches,
anxious to buy his lust to a
vender who is not selling.

You are not a woman,
how could you hear?

My mumbled no’s in the dark,
stifled cries of pain and
demanding thoughts to keep quiet,
to bite my tongue
think of other things –
maybe of the man I loved
and still hold in my heart –
just to let it pass

It’s almost bearable; God please let it be over.

You are not a woman,
how could you know?

A movie ticket equals consent these days;
and the clothes I wear
are never for myself.
They all told me I wanted it;
I knew I didn’t but
what is my strength against theirs?

You are not a woman,
how could you know?

This voice of mine ran tired
of speaking up,
not because I wouldn’t be loud enough
or couldn’t be clear enough,
but instead because
I knew he wouldn’t listen.

They never do, Mom.

And I know you know all this,
Because you, too,
are a woman.