Hi, It’s Me, The Overlooked Best Friend Of The Hot Protagonist You’re Falling In Love With

Hiiiiiiiiiiiii, it’s me — the overlooked BFF of the super hot protagonist you’re falling in love with. You may not have noticed me because the hot protagonist is significantly hotter and I’m just here as a comedic foil, rather than an actual fully-developed character. You could probably tell that just by looking at me because I’m wearing pajama pants in public and my hair is perpetually in, like, butterfly clips for some reason. Gah, fashion is hard when you aren’t the super hot female lead! We aren’t allowed to even have the same hair color! I need to be weird!

My sole purpose here is to provide the ~*~comedy~*~ part of ~*~romantic comedy.~*~ Basically, when I come on screen, you guys know to get ready to L O L. Watch me spill coffee on my shirt!

My hot protagonist BFF is constantly complaining about how too many guys love her (?) or not enough guys love her (!?) or the wrong guy loves her (!?!), and I’m just sitting here with a face mask on and talking to my dog — while dishing out some seriously phenomenal love advice that she will not listen to until it’s too late (which doesn’t make any sense coming from me, because no leading man will look in my direction — but, like, his weird roommate is into me. Naturally.)

I am so full of wisdom and just so wise, despite the fact that I am really just telling my hot protagonist BFF very regular things (haha, maybe just, like, tell him the truth?!!?) that everyone should know anyway. I don’t know what my true purpose is because she’s definitely going to ditch me the second this guy falls in love with her. I just want to be sure this movie doesn’t pass the Bechdel test. Do women talk about things that aren’t your hot protagonist BFF’s man problems?

Sometimes I’m a good example of what not to do — inspiring my hot protagonist BFF to do the complete opposite so that she may become successful and happy (read: fall in love). Yup, I’ll take one for the team! You want me to be clingy? Should I cry a lot? Push men away with my feelings? (I don’t need to have interacted a real life women to write this character, right?)

I just want the best for my super hot protagonist BFF. I am but a shell of a human being without her needing me to help her land the man of her dreams. Also I am probably played by Judy Greer.