50+ Puns for All Ages to Laugh At

Puns are the perfect way to put a smile on a loved one's face. Make them laugh with a witty double entendre they'll never forget.

By Katee Fletcher

Updated 4 years ago, April 29, 2021

Two Yellow Emoji on Yellow Case — Pixabay

Nothing is as clever and subtly hilarious as a good pun. A pun is when someone exposes the multiple meanings of a word in a sentence or uses two words that sound similar but have different meanings to make a joke. Another name for this rhetorical strategy is known as a “double entendre” or a “play on words”, which means a word or phrase that has two meanings. When used the right way, puns can be hysterical, especially if someone has a good sense of humor. Not to mention, they’re very easy to form and use as jokes! Use them as a way to make any loved one laugh and brighten their spirits after a long day. To find examples of punny jokes that will put a smile on anyone’s face, browse the list of puns below.

Hilarious Puns

These puns will make you laugh and cringe all at the same time. Loosen up the dinner table by cracking a funny pun to get the conversation going or use these to cheer up a friend that’s had a hard day. However you use these hilarious puns, they’re sure to get a corny smile on someone’s face.

I wanted to buy a camouflage shirt, but I couldn’t find one in the store.
A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
A pessimist’s blood type is always “B-negative”.
So, I went to a seafood disco last week and ended up pulling a mussel.
Two pianists always end up having a good marriage because they’re always in a chord.
I held the door open for a clown the other day. He told me it was a nice jester.
What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle? Attire.
How much does a pirate pay for an ear of corn? A buccaneer.
Don’t interrupt someone working intensely on a puzzle, because if you do, you might hear some crosswords.
Why don’t cows ever have money? Farmers always seem to milk them dry.

The duck said to the bartender, “Hye, put it on my bill!”
I heard that the best way to get in touch with a fish is to drop them a line.
What did the mom tomato say to the baby tomato? “C’mon honey, ketchup!”
Which building in New York has the most stories? The public library.
What did the pepperoni say to the mushroom? “You will always have a pizza my heart.”
Want to hear a joke about paper? It’s tear-ible enough to laugh at.
What did the espresso say to the coffee bean? “You keep me grounded.”
What did the barista say to his new coworker? “You’re a latte fun.”
The best way to stop a charging bull is to revoke his credit card.
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with but I can’t stop tripping!

What did the artery say to the muscle? “You’re being a little vein.”
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
A five-dollar bill walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey, this is a singles bar, get out.”
What happened to the guy who sued the airline company over his missing luggage? He lost his case.
Why did the king go to the bathroom? So he could sit on the head of the royal throne.
The farmer was talking about how a horse was a very stable animal.

Funny Puns

More funny puns to keep the mood light and happy! Break out these funny puns at a party to make your friend chuckle or use them to break the ice with new people. However they’re put to use, they’re bound to get someone giggling.

A dog ended up giving birth to puppies near the road and was ticketed for littering.
The other day, I asked my French friend if she enjoys any video games. She said, “Wii.”
I thought about making myself a belt out of old watches but then decided it was a waist of time.
What did the heart say to the lungs? “You take my breath away.”
Why did the can crusher quit his job? It was soda pressing.

The machine at the coin factory suddenly stopped working. It didn’t make any cents!
The golfer decided to bring an extra pair of pants just in case he got a hole in one.
Why does Peter Pan fly all the time? Because he Neverlands.
Wow! This whiteboard is remarkable.
I once knew a woman who owned a taser. Boy was she stunning.
Always trust a glue salesman. I heard they’re very good at sticking to their word.
What did the right eye say to the left eye? Between you and me, something smells.

I heard that reading while sunbathing makes you very well red.
Did you know that a chicken farmer’s favorite car is a coupe?
I’ve gone to the dentist so many times now. Trust me, I know the drill.
Two silk worms had a race and they ended up in a tie.
When a new hive is done, bees apparently throw a house swarming party.
Why can’t you trust a burrito? Cause it will spill the beans. — Alan Griffin

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An investigator.
I drove by a sign the other day that read, “Broken puppets for sale. No strings attached.”
Never tell a lie to an x-ray technician. They can see right through you.
How do you get a baby alien to fall asleep? You rocket.
What did the volcano say to his wife? I lava you so much.
What did the watermelon say to the honeydew melon? You’re one in a melon.
Jill broke her finger in the accident. But, on the other hand, she was completely fine.
The grape said nothing when he was stepped on. Instead, he let out a little wine.
I took a photo of a field of wheat. It was very grainy.
What do you call a pig that does karate? Porkchop!
What do you call an average, everyday potato? A commentator.
How do you organize a space party? You planet.

More Humorous, Punny Jokes

Below are more clever puns to share with loved ones and make them smile.

Hilarious Puns

I wanted to buy a camouflage shirt, but I couldn’t find one in the store.

A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

A pessimist’s blood type is always “B-negative”.

So, I went to a seafood disco last week and ended up pulling a mussel.

Two pianists always end up having a good marriage because they’re always in a chord.

I held the door open for a clown the other day. He told me it was a nice jester.

What’s the difference between a poorly dressed man on a unicycle and a well-dressed man on a bicycle? Attire.

How much does a pirate pay for an ear of corn? A buccaneer.

Don’t interrupt someone working intensely on a puzzle, because if you do, you might hear some crosswords.

Why don’t cows ever have money? Farmers always seem to milk them dry.

The duck said to the bartender, “Hye, put it on my bill!”

I heard that the best way to get in touch with a fish is to drop them a line.

What did the mom tomato say to the baby tomato? “C’mon honey, ketchup!”

Which building in New York has the most stories? The public library.

What did the pepperoni say to the mushroom? “You will always have a pizza my heart.”

Want to hear a joke about paper? It’s tear-ible enough to laugh at.

What did the espresso say to the coffee bean? “You keep me grounded.”

What did the barista say to his new coworker? “You’re a latte fun.”

The best way to stop a charging bull is to revoke his credit card.

I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with but I can’t stop tripping!

What did the artery say to the muscle? “You’re being a little vein.”

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

A five-dollar bill walks into a bar and the bartender says, “Hey, this is a singles bar, get out.”

What happened to the guy who sued the airline company over his missing luggage? He lost his case.

Why did the king go to the bathroom? So he could sit on the head of the royal throne.

The farmer was talking about how a horse was a very stable animal.

Funny Puns

A dog ended up giving birth to puppies near the road and was ticketed for littering.

The other day, I asked my French friend if she enjoys any video games. She said, “Wii.”

I thought about making myself a belt out of old watches but then decided it was a waist of time.

What did the heart say to the lungs? “You take my breath away.”

Why did the can crusher quit his job? It was soda pressing.

The machine at the coin factory suddenly stopped working. It didn’t make any cents!

The golfer decided to bring an extra pair of pants just in case he got a hole in one.

Why does Peter Pan fly all the time? Because he Neverlands.

Wow! This whiteboard is remarkable.

I once knew a woman who owned a taser. Boy was she stunning.

Always trust a glue salesman. I heard they’re very good at sticking to their word.

What did the right eye say to the left eye? Between you and me, something smells.

I heard that reading while sunbathing makes you very well red.

Did you know that a chicken farmer’s favorite car is a coupe?

I’ve gone to the dentist so many times now. Trust me, I know the drill.

Two silk worms had a race and they ended up in a tie.

When a new hive is done, bees apparently throw a house swarming party.

Why can’t you trust a burrito? Cause it will spill the beans. — Alan Griffin

What do you call an alligator wearing a vest? An investigator.

I drove by a sign the other day that read, “Broken puppets for sale. No strings attached.”

Never tell a lie to an x-ray technician. They can see right through you.

How do you get a baby alien to fall asleep? You rocket.

What did the volcano say to his wife? I lava you so much.

What did the watermelon say to the honeydew melon? You’re one in a melon.

Jill broke her finger in the accident. But, on the other hand, she was completely fine.

The grape said nothing when he was stepped on. Instead, he let out a little wine.

I took a photo of a field of wheat. It was very grainy.

What do you call a pig that does karate? Porkchop!

What do you call an average, everyday potato? A commentator.

How do you organize a space party? You planet.

More Humorous, Punny Jokes

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