Kara Durst

While it’s true our beloved Disney princesses and fair heroines end up living happily ever after, that’s not to say that they don’t’ put up with some serious fuckboy-ism along the way.

Basically, there are few things finer than watching your favorite Hollywood heartbreakers come together in the name of love, and simultaneously giving you a romantic journey to actively and vicariously live through.

A onesie is kind of like a condom for the body to sleep in.

Anytime I overhear friends or radio announcers voice the athlete’s surname, my head and heart are bombarded with the savory delight that is Indian cuisine.

Hey, feeling less than heroic on Monday morning is a pretty good indicator you had a bragging-rights weekend packed with laughs, Instagram-worthy photos and enough calories to seriously reconsider some lifestyle choices.

Life can be taxing on a trophy wife and pills are more fun than a therapist. Knowledge is power.

Hermes scarves, and strappy sandals as she pounces around Italy. A wardrobe so Pinterest-board worthy, it was destined to be replicated by women everywhere.

When Gaston is not enhancing celebrity strands at the salon, you can find him inappropriately advancing both women and men on Tinder.

Puking, as much as you miss it, is few and far between these days. You left the glamour of hangovers behind with your 20s, bless.

Introverts tend to mind their own business because they legit don’t care about extrovert’s drama. Extroverts tend to exaggerate even the most pointless, boring of events.

It’s freezing in here! Frozen food aisle, so we meet again and still you are so cold towards me. You don’t support my small, chic wardrobe and that’s your loss.

You can’t take a baby out shopping or out for an overpriced craft cocktail. Department stores don’t have daycare centers and wine bars don’t have highchairs (thank God).

Darth Vader seems to really have his shit together.