Kara Crabb

Sam runs down the hill, sliding mostly, a throaty call of panic lifting from his diaphragm.

Mani threw big rocks in the water and we laughed at the sound it made.

If it’s about losing weight DON’T EAT YOGURT.

And I laughed, thinking that it would be funny if I banged Charlie Murphy.

He told me he wants someone SWEET who would be a good mother and I told him I wanted to die.

It would open with two girls lounging. One girl looks like Lorde, like Malala Yousafzai but Lorde, definitely hot, no makeup. She’s like “Eff the war, eff the economy, everything sucks, guys are stupid. We need to wage war on males by not effing them.”

One of my favorite things to do in the world is get extremely high and watch live theatre because the suspension of disbelief is like mega television.

Pro: You get to feel semen.

My neck, in particular, it feels like muscles are squeezing together, I’ve been stopping to stretch like a snake.

Claire laughed both at the idea of someone earnestly identifying as a witch, and then at the suggested relationship between “kitten stickers” and “witches.”

I thought, “Should I empty out my backpack onto the floor right now in this crowded room full of people, cover my MacBook Air in plastic, put everything back in my bag, and bike home?” Then, because I am stupid I thought, “Nahhh.”

Uncle Jean’s fiancé simply asked me what I did on the weekend and I answered with sincerity.