Jim Goad

Multiculturalism appears necessary only to erase borders in the service of creating a global labor pool.

1. ’Tis better to give than receive.
Fine. Give me everything you have.

She’s loved and followed celebrities her whole life, ever since she was a little girl.

No matter how bad the food or service is, I usually don’t complain at restaurants because I don’t want the servers or chefs to tamper with anything I’m going to eat.

We’re hooking up later tonight.

A person who fails after making an honest-to-goodness attempt at suicide is a double loser—first because they tried killing themselves, and second because they couldn’t even get that right.

Sure, you see them hugging one another and patting each other’s asses on the playing field all the time…but spooning in bed?

Today is International Workers’ Day, where workers across the globe gather together and pretend there’s something great about being a worker.

It is a testament to Michael Jackson’s work ethic that nearly five years after his death, he continues to tour.

Radical environmentalism may be the dumbest folk religion ever devised. It’s definitely the only one where the sinners are assigned the task of saving God.

I want to spare you the pain of learning these lessons alone.

If the moral lesson here is that everyone should want to hang out with black people, then I think we have failed in getting this lesson across to Mr. Sterling.

You give people power, and they’re going to abuse it. That might as well be a law of physics.

Jesus said to turn the other cheek, and look what happened to him.

OK, sure it’s improper, but is it unacceptable? Beyond that, should we tolerate this? And who gets to decide?

When did “Negro” become a dirty word?

The word “awesome” has spread like genital warts throughout the body politic.

As the episode unfolded, the best minds of Twitter convened to obsess over the eyebrow of a female cast member named Gabi.