I Choose To Be Grateful For Our Almost Relationship

You said you were not ready for anything.

And it was the worst irony as that was the exact same time I finally realized that I was. You told me, straight up, that you were not ready for anything with me, and that just suddenly put a painful end to a love story I thought would last. I gotta admit, it hurts and it still is fucking hurting me because our story hasn’t even started yet and you were already so damn scared when I was at my bravest to jump into the unknown with you. It hurts thinking how everything between us was just a taste of something that could’ve been beautiful. It makes me weak in my knees just knowing how all these were just a taste of something that I’ve always wanted. It would’ve been a lot easier to just hate you but I choose not to let that happen.

Instead, I choose to keep the memories I managed to make with you in the shortest period of time.

I’ll keep all the late-nights talks and abrupt dates we had as you tried to squeeze in time enough to see me and be with me.

I’ll keep all those sweet nothings that became everything to me.

I’ll keep all those messages you’d randomly send me just to remind me you do exist and I am not anymore delusional that I have finally found the perfect man for me.

I’ll keep all those times when you make sure I know I am a priority and that no one else can ever steal you away from me because you know exactly who you want.

I’ll choose to be grateful that once upon a time, you chose me over them.

You chose to be alone with me than to be one of the overwhelming crowd. You chose to make me feel special like a princess deserving of all the beautiful things possible.

We had to cut our story real short, and instead of allowing it to kill all my hopes for love, I choose to hope even more. So, I’ll just keep all the memories of you, no matter how few, in the deepest part of my heart and that will be enough for me to smile at the thought of you.

And I sincerely hope that someday, you’ll be ready not just for something or anything, but for everything even if it’s not with me.