Instead Of Watching Porn When You Masturbate, Use Your Imagination

No porn has ever managed to top my imagination. The flutters in your stomach. The roaming tingles. Bottom lip bitten, eyes wide shut. So good you moan to yourself. Maybe say your own name. No? Okay.

Nothing screen-made even comes close.

Imagination is our most underrated sexual gift. We can live any fantasy we want in our own heads. Script the dialogue. Create a willing partner from thin air, make them look like anyone. Or anything.

Make them do anything.

And the acting’s so much better.

Hey, I’m just saying.

Lots of people have opinions on porn. Some say it’s liberating, others sexist. Some argue that too much can ruin your sex life, others that it offends God. I agree with everyone, except the bigots. Porn can be great. It’s just like anything — moderation makes for healthy living.

But porn has one possible downside. Something nobody seems to talk about. Too much can limit your sexual creativity. Ever think about that?

At some point in our lives, we’ve had to rely on our imagination alone to get ourselves off. For example, when the wifi goes out. When that happens, we exercise our brains. Pleasing ourselves without porn forces us to think about what turns us on. Not just accept what’s given.

Be honest. How often have you spent an hour or more trying to find some download that fits a ready-made fantasy in your head?

If you can find something close, enjoy it.

But don’t diss your brain.

Your brain might give you exactly what you want.

Plus, your brain’s fast. I mean, incredibly fast. Mine can cook up a fantasy in seconds. Best part? The moment I think about something, my brain gives me a rough cut. Like Kate Beckinsale and Chris Hemsworth and me in a luxury hotel room, overlooking Manhattan, two bottles of champagne. My brain can deliver that to me in about one second.

And it’s fucking vivid.

How? I’ve watched lots of movies starring them both. And I’ve seen my share of sex scenes. That’s all my brain needs. It can throw everything together in a jiffy. In fact, it’s already done post-production. We’re ready for release.

Porn is an art form. But any art can turn into commodification. And commodities are limited by nature. Search all you want, you won’t find anything on PornHub that matches the fantasy in my head right now. Believe it or not, your brain has no limits. Your brain’s way more powerful than you give it credit for.

Sorry, spaced out. Last two minutes, I imagined an intimate love scene between James Purefoy and Billie Piper. They made love on a rooftop in London. Watching the stars.

It was amazing. Wish you could’ve been there.

Your brain can deliver porn beyond your wildest dreams. You just have to learn how to use it. I wish I could teach you how to employ your brain. Unfortunately, I can’t. But here’s more good news. Your brain comes with its own instruction manual. Even better, you don’t have to read it!

You’re asking me: Jessica, where do I even start?

Simple. Lie down, and think about sex. What kind of sex do you want?

Let’s imagine you see a gorgeous guy or girl at the gym. Or at Starbucks. There’s just something about them. You can’t quite shove your feelings into words, but the sight of them sends you into a tizzy.

Happens to me every other week.

Fantastic. Save that in your head. Next chance you get, lie down and fantasize about them. Whatever you want. Make it happen. In your head.

Presto. You’ve just made your own porn. And I’ll bet you a mocaccino that fantasy beats the last ten pornos you watched.

Why? Because it’s yours. You chose it. You made it. Nobody will ever produce porn as good as what your brain does.

For free.

My imagination has come in handy, given the dearth of porn in my specific fetish. Yeah, not much quality sexbot content out there. I’ve watched a lot, and most just doesn’t flip my switch.

It’s a good thing my brain comes equipped with its own movie studio. You can spend hours scouring the dark web for porn crafted to your specific tastes, or you can lie down for twenty minutes and finish feeling like a brand new person. Head porn’s the best on the market.

And it’s free. Did I mention that?

You can imagine your own porn. Trust in yourself. You can do it. Hey, I believe in you. I believe you can imagine your own porn.

Myself? I’ve never watched much porn. Precisely because I prefer my imagination. It’s not that I find sex on film shocking, unnatural, or immoral. I’m just a hard customer. Extremely picky, turned off in a flash. One closeup of a dick from the wrong angle, and I’ll ask for a refund.

If I don’t like the guy’s haircut, I swipe left on that shit. Same goes for the girl’s makeup, or the decor. I’ve ditched porn because the nightstand looked out of place. And I don’t want the actors making too much noise, either. Finally, I want them to kiss for just the right amount of time.

That’s why I especially don’t watch porn before sex.

My partners and I have tried, just for fun. It never worked very well. What happened? We found two clips that I enjoyed. And I kept watching them over and over. Nothing else really turned me on.

I’m also impatient when it comes to porn. If I don’t find something I like within five minutes, I just lie down and do everything myself.

There’s some dark stuff out there. I’ve watched kidnap porn. Anime porn. Rape porn. Autopsy porn. Yeah, that’s an actual thing.

The strangest porn I’ve ever watched? Vore. Sexual fantasies that involve eating someone alive, or being eaten. Examples: a chick gets devoured by an enormous snake. A giant alien fries a girl for breakfast. A spider sucks the blood out of a group of college students.

Some people find these fantasies disturbing. Freakish. Not me. I’m the porn whisperer. Say it, and I’m probably into it. Or at least I can understand. And if it doesn’t turn me on, it doesn’t exactly turn me off either. And yet if the nightstand doesn’t match, we’re closed for business.

Yeah, strange.

Some people might say I need to loosen up. Let go. Ease up on my porn expectations. I’ll be happier. But that’s the thing. I’ve never needed porn. Not really. Because I’ve always had my imagination. I’m not saying quit porn. Don’t boycott it. I just mean don’t undersell your imagination. Don’t rely on the industry for everything. You’re a human being with an imagination. It’s a beautiful thing. Use that.