Jessica Blankenship

“I am just a small girl in a big world trying to find someone who knows the wifi password here.”

Polar Vortex (hey, didn’t I see them open for Flaming Lips?) might be bringing the icy hammer of Hoth down upon half of North America right now, but there were a few perky (they had good support) moments for women in the news today.

I really cannot deal with another “insider’s guide to Atlanta” that tells you to go to the Varsity. Sit down, amateurs. Whoever wrote that sh*t probably lives in Cobb County. Here’s a small sampling of what is truly up.

We are the best versions of ourselves when we are doing what we love, not when we are trying to deliberately convince someone to love us.

A friendly public service announcement from your non-engaged friends: don’t become an unbearable monster. Also, we love you.

I hate to break it to all the Rachels of the world, but Ross was totally fine when he boned the girl at the copy place.

We wouldn’t have to wait to realize that we already have everything we need. We would tell ourselves how special and lovely and breathtakingly unique we are. We would rescue ourselves.

There is no more worthwhile service that a bar can serve for a tender, violently self-discovering young person than to make them feel accepted. And drunk. Everyone needs to frequently be made to feel quite accepted and quite drunk in their twenties.

I’m guessing this little girl has already figured out what her parents want when they focus the camera on her: FACE. FEELINGS. ENERGY. SPARKLE. MAGIC. That’s not what they got. May we all keep it this real at all times.

Tending to the details of daily existence is what truly makes for a well-lived life, and makes us feel empowered to bring about more substantial positive change. Here are a few good places to start.

To demonstrate sexism on men’s websites, the word “woman” in this article has been replaced with “dog”, and the word “man” has been replaced with “owner”. Nothing else has been changed.

2014 already kicking us in the balls by robbing us of one of the only true beacons of unfettered paternal strength we had, James “Uncle Phil” Avery, who died yesterday at age 65. Not the way to warm up a room, 2014.