Conversations With Strength

So today
all I’ve done is cry
my muscles have left me
my strength has taken its pants off
and is wearing a soft robe
taking a bath
reading a newspaper
“you’ll be fine”
strength says
“just be there”
“on the floor?”
I whine
“will I ever stand?”
“of course you’ll stand
you can only cry for so long
there cannot only be tears in your heart
just as there cannot only be joy”
“I’m so tired of choosing these ones”
“I know, love” strength says softly
he gets out of the bath
and pats over in his slippers
and just looks at me
with a little sigh
and I look up
and being seen makes me wish to just cry harder
“you should just stay there”
he says
as he walks into the next room
“but, wait.. what if I can’t do it?”
“you will”
“but what if tomorrow I still can’t?”
“then tomorrow you won’t”
“all of this is okay
don’t you see?”
and I don’t
because I’m lying on the floor
and when you are lying on the floor
with tears welling in your eyes
you forget that you will ever rise again.