I Am Not A Distraction, I Am The Main Event

I am someone that is worth the same amount of love that I give you. 

By

women's orange and black floral back tattoo
Anthony Tran / Unsplash

I am done putting your needs above everyone else, even above myself.

I am done prioritizing your world while mine is falling apart.

I am done worrying if: You ate dinner? Did you get enough rest? Are you sick?

I am done making my world revolve around you.

I am done being used, abused and taken for granted.

I am done being your option, someone you only think of when you have time.

I am not someone you only think of when you’re standing in line and you needed a loan because you can’t afford your sandwich.

I am not someone you only think of when some girl decided to dump you out of the blue.

I am not someone you only think of when you run into trouble and needed saving.

I am not someone you respond to only when you feel like it.

I am not someone you only remember when you need a favor.

I am someone you think of when you’re drinking your morning coffee.

I am someone you think of intermittently as you go about your day.

I am someone you think of when you go to the grocery store and see my favorite cereal.

I am someone you respond to within minutes of receiving my text.

I am someone you answer the phone calls of, no matter what time of day.

I am someone that is worth the same amount of love that I give you.

So while I still have some self-respect left, I am walking away from you.

I am walking away from the toxic relationship we have where I am the only one giving and you just keep on taking.

I am walking away from the person whom I considered to be my world while he only thought of me as an option.

I am walking away from a situation where I feel my self-worth is diminishing every minute that I wait for your response to my text or wait for you to return my phone calls.

I am walking away from someone who only sees me as an open bank account and repository of favors.

I am walking away from someone who sees me as just a distraction not the main event.

I am walking away from the dream that someday you will see me for who I am and love me for who I am.

I am walking away from the fantasy that you and I will have a happy ever after.

I am closing the door to whatever it is we had.

As my friend said, “He needs you, you don’t need him”

She was right.

I don’t need you.

So I am walking away.

Goodbye. Thought Catalog Logo Mark


About the author

Jainie Left

Aspiring writer, adventurer and photography hobbyist. Filled with wanderlust and excited to embark on a new adventure.