Holly Riordan

I hate waiting for replies. I hate spending the time between messages wondering if I said something stupid and if the other person is going to hate me for it. 

I’m not used to getting the person that I want. I’m used to having my heart broken before the relationship officially begins. 

I overthink what it means when someone takes too long to answer a text — and when someone answers a text too quickly.

“When my uncle was younger he and his friends stole a car, drove across the country to Montana, and ended up holding a family hostage to run from the cops.”

Screw you for getting scared off whenever I tried to get closer to you. For making me feel like I did something wrong, just by loving you. For convincing me that I was the problem, not you, never you. 

I keep my heart closed. My ribcage slammed shut. I push people away as soon as they start to mean something to me because I’m scared of getting too close to anyone.

When you fall in love with a Cancer, you’ll never go a day without getting a compliment that makes your cheeks hurt from smiling so wide. 

She wants to become a success story. So she puts in the hours, even when it sucks.

Someone set up this place. Someone planned for this. Someone picked us for a reason.

You’ve seen at least one ghost in your lifetime. And you feel like you’ve gotten messages from people who have passed away. It’s like you have a connection to the spirit world.

Your forever person isn’t the one who makes you hide in the bathroom and cry your eyes out alone. They’re the one who follows you into the bathroom and sits on the floor with you until you feel okay again. 

You don’t have to answer every text he sends and pretend like you’re fine, like nothing happened, like you haven’t been crying your eyes out over him.

It’s reaching over to grab their hand, because you forgot that they aren’t there with you.

You know his passcode by heart. He never hesitates to recite it to you, because he isn’t hiding anything.

I’m tired of almost relationships that end before they become official. I’m tired of first dates that never lead to a second and flirtatious texts that never add up to anything real. 

Date someone who kisses you on your forehead and the back of your neck before you fall asleep. Someone who makes sure the last words you hear before you drift off are: I love you.

There’s a reason it sometimes takes him days to message you back — if he even answers at all.

Try to enjoy every second that you spend with him, so when your ‘relationship’ eventually ends, you’re happy about the memories you made instead of disappointed about the future you never got to have.