Holly Riordan

You aren't supposed to text your ex to meet up with them. You aren't supposed to log back onto Tinder. You aren't supposed to hit on the first person who catches your eye at the bar.

You are brave for choosing to get in touch with your feelings instead of running away from them, instead of raising your walls and locking your heart in a cage.

You are labeled as clingy unless you wait weeks between texts. You are labeled as overemotional unless you pretend nothing bothers you. You are labeled as psycho unless you let other people stomp all over your heart without saying a word.

A relationship is not going to make you love yourself. A relationship is not going to cure your anxiety or depression.

You are allowed to act vulnerable, to admit when something is bothering you, even when it seems like the rest of the world is bragging about how little they care.

You are never going to capture another heart until you release your own into the wild.

When you love someone, you don’t see how many times you can screw up and get away with it. You don’t take advantage of their forgiveness.

You can’t change another person. You can’t force them into breaking bad habits. If they aren’t interested in changing, then it will never happen, no matter how much you encourage them, no matter how much you love them.

It's hard to move on when you are still wondering what could have been.

We believe spending enough time together will form an unbreakable bond. We believe they will grow to feel the same way about us because our emotions are too strong to be one-sided.

We avoid asking questions about labels because we are worried about coming across as clingy or desperate or controlling. We let the love of our lives get away because we are holding back our emotions, censoring our conversations, raising our guards.

When I use dating apps, the ‘relationship’ normally doesn’t get passed the texting phase.

I guess our friendship was only able to survive when we were both single.

Love someone who uninstalls their dating apps as soon as your relationship turns official, not someone who keeps backup plans around in case you break up.

Sometimes, love is snuggling onto shoulders during train rides home, resting hands on thighs during long road trips, squeezing sweaty palms on planes.

We have been the one who cared more in the past, and quite frankly, we are exhausted. We don't want to bother putting in effort that will not be returned. We don't want to bother to send texts that are going to be ignored. We don't want to bother to get attached to someone who…