Holly Riordan

Putting effort into your relationship also means making sure your own mental health is okay. It means putting effort into taking care of yourself. It means putting yourself high on your list of priorities. 

It’s ridiculous to expect yourself to have your whole life together in your twenties. Your twenties are for discovering yourself. They’re for making mistakes. They’re for growing into a better, stronger version of yourself. You’re not supposed to be complete yet. You’re supposed to be a work in progress. 

You walk around like you’re confident. You call yourself a hot mess like it’s a badge of honor. But deep down, you’re worried you’re unlovable.

You don’t have to rearrange your morals, your standards, and your expectations in order to make room for someone in your world. 

When you care about someone, don’t worry about appearing clingy or needy or overemotional. Don’t hold back the way you’re feeling out of fear it won’t be reciprocated. Don’t stay inside of your comfort zone. Break out and take risks. Embrace the unknown. Be more spontaneous, more adventurous. Stop playing it so safe. 

Time isn’t going to stop because you’re in a bad mood.

You should celebrate the fact that you’ve gone a few days without engaging with anyone toxic. That you’ve gone a few weeks without falling back into your bad habits. That you’ve gone a few months treating yourself with more kindness than in the past. 

I don’t have to worry about impressing you anymore. I don’t have to worry about chasing after you anymore. I don’t have to worry about trying to be enough anymore.

Libra: Even though 2019 didn’t treat you kindly, 2020 is going to be a time of healing for you. It’s going to give you the opportunity to rebuild. It’s going to remind you that you aren’t a failure, you aren’t a lost cause, you aren’t falling behind.

The longer you’re in a toxic relationship, the less you’ll recognize yourself. The less happy you’ll be with yourself. The less you’ll trust yourself.

Part of a strong, committed relationship is growing together. Figuring out your futures together. Helping each other become better versions of yourself through encouragement, motivation, and unconditional support.

It’s sad to say goodbye, even to someone toxic, so don’t let your hesitation trick you into believing you’re making the wrong decision.

It’s better to know how they feel than guess how they feel.

It allows you to stay cautious. It allows you to move at a pace that makes you feel comfortable. It allows you to see someone’s true colors before you hand them your whole heart.

You endured your weakest moments, your toughest tragedies, your most mountainous insecurities.

Stop saying to yourself, “He loves me. He’ll change for me.” And start saying to yourself, “He loves me, and yet he still hurt me. He’s the kind of person who can hurt the people he loves.”

You can scream at them, you can curse them out, or you can calmly present facts to them — but it’s not going to make a difference. They have a talent for shapeshifting reality. They create their own truth.

In 2020, stop isolating yourself in order to protect yourself. Stop assuming you’re better off on your own.