Holly Riordan

You need to go easier on yourself when you make a mistake, when you say the wrong thing, when you mess up your plans.

When you know he’s going to break your heart, but you chase him anyway, it’s not because you’re stupid. It’s not because you’re reckless. It’s not because you’re on some self-destructive path where you’re actively trying to break your own heart. 

If you only cut them out of your world halfway, if you end up talking to them every time you’re drunk or lonely, then you’re never going to get over them.

They are constantly checking in on their friends and family members, but they rarely take the time to check in with themselves, to ask themselves how they are feeling, to practice self-reflection and self-care. 

I am slowly learning how to say no without feeling too bad about it, without being drenched in guilt, without wondering whether people would have liked me more if I had stayed quiet and cooperative.

The truth is, love isn’t convenient. It requires constant effort. It requires you to put in work every single day.

You shouldn’t have to convince them you have value. You shouldn’t have to convince them you’re worthy of being loved.

You could move on from them if you really tried, but the problem is, you never try for long enough. You always end up wanting them again, because even though they might disappear for a while, there is never a real goodbye. There is never an official ending to your story. There is never any closure. 

You made it this far because you are strong. You’ve been through hell and back. You’ve dealt with toxic situations, toxic humans, toxic thoughts. You’ve even warred with the demons deep within yourself.

If he likes you, he’ll find the time to talk to you even if he’s busy. Even if the conversation only lasts a few minutes before he has to get back to work again. 

The right person is not going to consider you clingy. They are going to be excited about all of the attention you give. They are never going to accuse you of coming across too strong. They are never going to make you feel like you need to tone it down.

You shouldn’t distance yourself from people who care about you, simply because you’re scared the past is going to repeat itself. You shouldn’t deprive yourself of the chance to build something real.

It’s going to be hard to get rid of the insecurities they’ve given you, the way they’ve warped your heart.

Progress is hard to spot from where you’re standing.

Remember, you can forgive a toxic human while still recognizing that you’re better off without them.  

You decided not to talk to me anymore. You decided our ‘relationship’ was over. But you don’t get to decide if it starts again.

When you’re texting them, you’re given the chance to develop a relationship that goes deeper than the superficial level. You’re able to really get to know them.

When you love someone, you should be there for them, no matter what emotion they are experiencing. You shouldn’t run away when they get too real with you. You shouldn’t flee at the first sign of genuine emotion. You shouldn’t make them feel like they are too clingy or dramatic or annoying, simply for sharing their thoughts with you.