Holly Riordan

Reassurance. She wants to know that you haven’t grown bored of her. Haven’t lost interest in her. That you’re still as in love with her now as you were when you first met her.

Hiding your emotions. It’s okay to be angry. Annoyed. Upset. In love. Don’t hide your emotions to seem like you have it all together. Nobody does.

Stay away from anyone that makes you feel like you’re hard to love. Like it’s an effort to make time for you. An effort to text you back. An effort to listen to your stories. An effort to be around you.

Date someone that enjoys spending time with you, even if that time doesn’t involve speaking. Someone that’s happy just to be in your presence. Just to feel your skin graze up against theirs. Just to look up and be reminded that you’re in the same room as them.

What would you do if you caught someone in a lie?

Canceling plans. Don’t bow out of a party at the last second, because you don't feel like getting dressed. Push yourself to go. Mingle. Meet new people. It might be the best night of your life. It might be the night you find your forever person.

“The husband’s intestines are hanging out while he is being raped, still alive. That’s how the comic starts. It gets bleaker from there.”

Find a person that always makes you feel missed when you’re not around. Always makes you feel beautiful when your insecurities rise up. Always makes you feel valuable. Always makes you feel wanted. Always makes you feel loved.

If the government doesn’t know about it, they should. After what happened to me. After what could happen to someone else.

Aquarius: He’s going to spoil you with words. Poems about how soft your skin feels. Songs about how sweet your lips taste. Texts about how lucky he is to have you.

A lumpy wedding dress sat on the floor, spotted with blood. At first, I thought it was the one from my closet. It took a few seconds to realize that the neckline differed from mine, and a few more to realize that a woman was inside of it.

You’re everything. Everything I ever wanted. Everything good in this world, in my world.

Frequently eating food that you know is going to make your semen taste disgusting.

Dried blood was crusted over the letters. I had to pick it off with the tip of my thumb, because it wouldn’t rub away with a cloth.

You were unexpected. Untamed. Unpredictable. I never knew what would happen when we were together. If our conversations would lead to dinner at the diner or to me escaping to the bathroom for a cry.

You care more about others than yourself. You think with your heart, but it isn’t your heart that you’re worried about. It’s everyone else’s hearts. You don’t want them to be sad. You want to bring them joy — even if that means you’re forced to suffer.

You’re going to accuse him of things he’d never do. And you know he’d never do them, but that doesn’t matter. That doesn’t silence the paranoia in the back of your brain. And when you make unfair accusations, he’ll get offended. He’ll hate that you don’t trust him.

One day, you’ll have someone to break up the monotony. Someone to hold your hand while ice-skating. Someone to squeeze your thigh at the movie theater. Someone to drag you onstage at a karaoke bar and take the wheel during a road trip and spoil you at your favorite restaurant.