5 Lessons I Learned From Watching My Almost Move On

1. There’s a reason you’re not together. Even though you might feel like you were soulmates, you must’ve been incompatible. There must’ve been something you needed from them that they were unwilling to give to you. Since the relationship wasn’t entirely fulfilling, that means you weren’t actually a perfect match. That means that your relationship wouldn’t have actually worked out, even if you became official. You need two people to be fully invested in a relationship in order for it to work. If you were the only one trying, that means no matter what you would’ve done, it never would’ve been enough.

2. Hearts are never permanently broken. They can get cracked and bruised, but they are never completely shattered. Right now, thinking about living without your almost might feel unbearable. It might make you sick to your stomach. It might make your chest physically ache. But eventually, you’ll be able to look at their happiness and get excited about how much they’ve accomplished. You’ll be glad your almost ended up with someone who fits them better. You’ll be glad they didn’t spend any more time on you if a relationship with you wasn’t what they truly wanted. You’ll be glad they gave you the chance to move onto better things.

3. You deserve so much more than an almost. Even though your almost might’ve been a good friend and held your hand and even kissed you on occasion, there was so much that they weren’t giving you. There was so much you were daydreaming about getting from them that they never offered you. There are so many deep, meaningful aspects to a serious, committed relationship that you lack with an almost. Remember, you never want to settle for someone who meets you halfway instead of waiting for someone who can give you everything you need. It might be a long wait, but it will be worth it in the end.

4. Comparisons aren’t worth it. When your almost ends up in a serious relationship with someone else, your instinct is probably going to be to compare yourself to that person. Are they more attractive? Are they older? Younger? Making more money? Living a more exciting life? However, you have to remember there’s only so much you can see through your phone screen. Maybe they simply have strong chemistry. Maybe they have history. Maybe they met at the right moment. You don’t know exactly why your almost ended up with them instead of you and trying to figure it out is only going to make you insecure.

5. Love can hurt like hell. Unfortunately, not all relationships are permanent. Some loves are only temporary. However, that doesn’t mean you should regret the memories you made with this person. You had fun together. You laughed together. You grew together. You shouldn’t feel embarrassed about wasting so much time on them when they ended up leaving in the end. Remember, just because a relationship didn’t work out doesn’t mean it was worthless. It still has value. Your memories still mean something.