16. You can travel on your own. The culture of hostelling basically throws the “Regular accidental contact” stuff out the window because guess what, you’re probably not going to see this person ever again in a day or two. Regular accidental contact is an impossibility (although it happened once for me, that blew my mind). Because of that you make the most of it now. You introduce yourself, get to know them and if you like them maybe the two (or more) of you can go on a crazy adventure together to solidify that friendship within a few hours. You can make friends literally all over the world this way and if you keep in contact maybe you can move to their country someday, or them to you. You might even find someone from your own city, if it’s relatively big then it’s possible.
17. Move to another country with very little money. You will either make friends or die.
18. Basically, be yourself and like yourself, do things you like to do, and put in a bit of effort.
1) This Is The Most Important. Be yourself, and be a person that you yourself like. Like tracts like, and if you dig yourself and are yourself you will attract the kind of people that you can develop friendships with.
If this seems daunting, invest in some counseling for yourself. Outsource the problem of being inauthentic or not loving yourself to an expert.Without this step you will not be able to form real, genuine bonds with other people. So seriously work on yourself first.
2) Once self esteem and authenticity issues are out of the way, put your awesome self out in the world and meet some new people. It’s just a matter if time before you start pulling kindred spirits in left and right, but if you put yourself in the right spots it will jump start the process.
Rather than say “I need friends,” which is rather nebulous, say “I want friends to do _____ with.” It will help guide you in the right direction.
You like something intellectual? Take a class or join a local interest group. Geology, coin collecting, book club, etc.
Love a certain band? Go to a concert and talk to the people around you.
You like drinking? Go hang out at a bar that has the vibe you like. Befriend the bartender, owner, regulars.
Sports are your thing? Probably not, because this one is so easy and recreational sport leagues are abundant…but if you like a sport go do that.Do you like your job? If not, seek out a job where you click with the culture. Your coworkers will become your buddies.
3) Finally, make the people that you meet feel welcome and wanted by being an active participant in the new friendship. Follow through. Put in the effort. Put yourself out there and invite people that you want to befriend to hang out. Initiate contact the appropriate amount for whatever your temperaments are.
