8. I hate when people tell me they know “the owner”. There are a group of owners. I will not treat you any differently than I treat people who don’t say they know an owner. A few weeks ago I heard “I know the owner’s brother” and wanted to rip the lady’s mouth off of her face. I don’t give a shit who you know. You just make yourself look like a giant asshole when you drop that line. You can’t have a discount and I’m not giving you anything free. I know all the owners, and they like making money.
9. My dad joining in with the waiters singing Happy Birthday for a table on the other side of the restaurant.
10. There is a circle of hell reserved for people that change diapers on the table in the middle of a restaurant. Seriously the bathroom is steps away. I don’t want to see or smell shit while I’m eating my tacos.
