13. That BITCH

I was dating a girl called Alison. My Grandma is also called Alison. I had mentioned that I found it a little weird that they had the same name, so once as we were having sex she asked “Does this make you think of your Grandma?”

It didn’t. Until then.

14. Does DM;HS apply here?

“Put on a condom, you don’t know where I’ve been.”

15. We commit infanticide every day

Had a girl grab my face in the middle of sex tell me it was okay if I came in her, then grabbed my face and told me, “I know how to kill babies!”