Dave Schilling

New York is not what everyone says it is. It’s not the “Greatest City in the World” and I didn’t immediately want to move here. I didn’t change my perspective on life like I was supposed to.

From the driver’s seat, everything in the car looked and felt different. I felt the constant churning of the engine in my ample backside, I could anticipate the
changing of the traffic lights for the first time, and a sense of power washed over me.

I love Morrissey, but not as much as Morrissey loves himself.

When I came back home, I asked my girlfriend, who is white and very into hip-hop culture, if she experienced the same thing when she went to rap concerts.

Chances are, you are not an expert on the culture of your significant other. You’ve never celebrated Kwanzaa, you don’t know what year it is in the Chinese calendar, and the only Irish food you are aware of is whiskey.

Interracial celebrity couples force the general public to confront the comingling of the races. It’s incredibly difficult to ignore a social trend when it is embodied by a wealthy, well-known public figure.

The fact that society even bothers to make the distinction between what is “black” and what is “white” creates an unavoidable tension in interracial couples and their children.

My white girlfriend particularly enjoys the Pharcyde song, “It’s Jiggaboo Time.” She likes it so much that she sings along to the lyrics.

In Los Angeles, it sometimes seems as though everyone is just lollygagging to and fro with no concern for time. This reinforces the stereotype that LA is a city for the lackadaisical lookie-loo. In truth, it’s just that New Yorkers think that if they don’t appear to be in a hurry, their neighbors will think they are from LA.

Babies have been getting circumcised for decades now. The general consensus is that it’s cleaner and is more aesthetically pleasing. Now, I’m no scientist, so I can’t say if it’s really more sanitary, but I also refuse to argue with fashion.

There are a few less romantic movies to watch with your girlfriend. Schindler’s List and Shoah come to mind off the top of my head.

All of us want, covet and desire. We want to be recognized. We covet material goods. We desire affection. “Like, favorite, share, upvote, etc.”