Marilyn Manson Sucks His Own Dick: The Oral History

In 1996, Marilyn Manson — shock rocker, political lightning rod and hero to wayward teenagers — was everywhere. He and his glam/horror rock bandmates were in heavy rotation on MTV and tearing up the Modern Rock Radio charts. Manson’s cultural reach stretched all the way to Congress, where legislators debated his influence on violent acts playing out in America’s schools. He was a lightning rod for controversy.

Manson disappeared at the height of his fame, escaping the public eye for three months in 1996. There was widespread speculation about his absence. Was he following orders from publicists to avoid the spotlight? Was he performing satanic ceremonies and sacrificing virgins, as his critics would’ve had you believe? The reality is far stranger. Marilyn Manson was undergoing surgery to have two ribs removed so he could suck his own dick.

Marilyn Manson, along with his friends, bandmates and doctors, recount the events that led to the historic moment when he first got his dick into his mouth.

I told him he was crazy. I heard about this kid in high school who did it and he broke his back. That’s true. It happened to my friend’s cousin. He lives in Canada. – Trent Reznor

A Pipe Dream and A Plan

Fed up with the tiresome routine of groupies and sexual conquests with strangers, Manson decides he wants to suck his own dick.

Marilyn Manson: It came down to one thing. I wanted to put my dick in my mouth. That was the goal. It’s a thing every young man tries at some point. I wanted to get that thing in there. I was finally at a point where I had the money, resources and the will to make it happen.

Twiggy Ramirez (Bassist, Marilyn Manson): Sucking my own dick? Hell yeah, I’ve tried it.

Manson: I started taking private yoga classes. I got one of those pilates machines for my home gym. If anyone asked, I just said I needed to get in better shape for my upcoming tour. The only person I talked to about what I was really doing was Trent Reznor.

Trent Reznor (Friend, Founder – Nine Inch Nails): I told him he was crazy. I heard about this kid in high school who did it and he broke his back. That’s true. It happened to my friend’s cousin. He lives in Canada.

Manson: I won’t lie. Trent’s story freaked me out. I didn’t want to break my back! I did some research on the internet and his story checked out. Apparently, this Canadian kid had his dick in his mouth when the paramedics showed up. Can you imagine the headlines if that happened to me? That was the last thing I needed. I already had these right wing pundits and bible thumpers up my ass.

Rush Limbaugh (Right Wing Pundit, Leader of the Anti-Manson Backlash): It’s funny. Looking back on it now, I did go after the guy pretty hard. I’m a Christian and a Conservative and he was just so…inhuman. He was sending this violent and satanic message to kids. It was disgusting and vulgar and unchristian. If I’d known then that he was just trying to get his dick in his mouth, I would’ve cut him some slack. (Laughs) I would’ve told him it’s a fool’s errand, though. I’ve been there!

Manson: At that point, I was sleeping with multiple women every night. I love women. Any age, ethnicity, style. I am just fascinated by the female form and I was in a position where these women wanted to be with me, a skinny loser kid from Florida. It was a dream come true. Still though, I needed to get my dick in my mouth.

Reznor: I told Brian (ed: Manson’s given name) about this doctor I’d met. He was the guy who sewed a lizard onto a human heart for NIN’s “Closer” video. We were talking on the set and he told me he did all these experimental surgeries on the super wealthy. He extended Calista Flockhart’s fingers by a quarter of an inch. He gave Bruce Springsteen a permanent soul patch. I told the doctor that Brian had been struggling with this issue. He gave me his card and told me to pass it along.

I couldn’t stop. It would have been like climbing Mt. Everest and turning back a hundred feet from the summit. – Marilyn Manson

False Starts and Drastic Measures

Meet Dr. Corbyn Foster, the man who believed he could make Manson’s dream a reality. Again, Manson’s dream is to suck his own dick.

Dr. Corbyn Foster (Experimental Surgeon): When Marilyn Manson contacted me, I was thrilled. I’d fallen into a rut, professionally. I was taking any surgery work I could get. It’d been six months since my last operation. The previous year had been a tough one. I’d only performed one surgery that year and permanently sewing that bandana to Axl Rose’s head wasn’t much of a challenge.

Manson: I went to Dr. Foster’s office to discuss the best way to make this thing happen. All of my stretching and fitness work had gotten me close.Really close. I was about two inches away from getting my erect penis in my mouth. I couldn’t stop. It would’ve been like climbing Mt. Everest and turning back a hundred feet from the summit.

Ramirez: It was really weighing on him. It was all he talked about at rehearsals. We were the only contact he had with the outside world so the pressure was on us to keep him from getting too obsessed with it. He was just singularly focused on it. By “it” I mean of course, sucking himself off.

Daisy Berkowitz (Guitarist, Marilyn Manson 1994–1997): He would do these diagrams all the time. He wheeled in this giant whiteboard and would be constantly scribbling these crazy math problems. Did you ever see that movie “A Beautiful Mind?” When I saw that I was like “Oh shit, is this movie about Russell Crowe trying to suck his own dick?” because it was the same kind of thing. You could see him starting to unravel.

Reznor: His bandmates called me one day in a panic. They were like, “He’s losing it. You need to come over and talk to him.” I get in my car and I drive to their rehearsal studio. Twiggy leads me into this little broom closet-type room. Brian is sitting there on the floor with his head between his knees, shaking. I assume he’s crying. I put my hand on his back and he says, “Just push down a little bit. I almost have my dick in my mouth.” It was getting bad.

Ramirez: He started seeing this doctor and for a while even that didn’t help. He’s come back from these appointments even more frustrated. It consumed his songwriting. We wrote all these songs that we later scrapped or rewrote for the Mechanical Animals album. The song “Dope Show” was originally called “The Dick Show” and “I Don’t Like Drugs (But The Drugs Like Me)” was originally called “I Want To Suck My Own Dick.”

Berkowitz: Then one day, I remember it was a Friday afternoon, he came in and he just looked like himself again. He had this calm expression. I asked him what was up and he just said, “I’ve got a plan.” He had this big smile on his face all day and we had the best rehearsal we’ve maybe ever had. Music just poured out of him that day. He was like a live wire of electricity.

Dr. Foster: When Brian came in that Friday he was angry. He’s calling me a hack and telling me he’s going to have my license revoked and all this stuff. He didn’t like any of my earlier suggestions. A few weeks earlier, I’d suggested a dick enlargement. It’s a relatively common procedure and there are multiple methods. I also suggested an alternative procedure called a “neck lengthening.” We do that by adding extra vertebrae to the spinal column. It’s very risky. I told him there was a 96% chance he’s end up paralyzed. He thought about it for about three weeks and decided it wasn’t worth it.

Manson: I almost went ahead with the neck thing. Sure, it was almost certain I’d be paralyzed but I kept thinking, “There’s a 4% chance I might get to put my dick in my mouth.” Honestly, until I got to Dr. Foster’s office that Friday I wasn’t sure. Ultimately, I couldn’t risk it. I was out of options and I was pissed.

Dr. Foster: I was sitting around one day watching my dog clean himself. I watched him intently and asked myself why it was so easy for this creature, which isn’t that different from you or I, to lick himself. That’s when it hit me. Dogs have very compact ribcages. It lengthens the torso and allows them a wider range of motion. I knew I’d figured it out. I have this in my mind when Manson comes storming into my office hooting and hollering. I just let him go on and on.

Manson: I was screaming at him. I’m in his face just going off! He’s just standing there with a big smile. Then, he raises his finger to my mouth and places it on my lips. I was stunned.

Dr. Foster: I held my finger up to his mouth until he quieted down. I leaned into his ear and just whispered, “We’re gonna remove two of your ribs.”

Manson: Honestly, it was so simple I couldn’t believe I hadn’t thought of it myself. It was clearly the body part that was most holding me back in my pursuit. Every time I got that dick close to my mouth I could feel that my bottom two ribs were kinda jutting into my abdomen, causing me discomfort. I’d like to make it clear here that my dick is definitely big enough to do this. The problem was the ribs! It was a huge relief.

Reznor: When Brian told me they were going to remove the ribs I was relieved. I just wanted my friend back.

I saw Rocky IV for the first time last year, the one where he fights the Russian guy. There’s a part where Rocky is training really hard and I was like, “Oh shit is this movie about Rocky sucking his own dick?” because it was the same kind of thing. – Daisy Berkowitz

Operation and Recovery

February 1st, 1996. Marilyn Manson enters Cedar Sinai Hospital in Los Angeles to undergo rib removal surgery. It’s the first operation of its kind performed in the United States. After thirteen grueling hours, the vertebral or “floating” ribs are successfully removed. Manson remains in the hospital for 27 days while his body adjusts to the changes. His internal organs are in a state of flux. With the help of experimental water therapy and acupuncture, Manson begins to regain a full range of motion.

Manson: I knew it wasn’t gonna be like, “BOOM! Surgery over. Let’s get that dick in my mouth.” It was a long road, but I was ready.

Berkowitz: The band went on hiatus while he recovered. He was training hard. Every time I went by to see him he was working out with a trainer or in the pool with his physical therapist. I saw Rocky IV for the first time last year, the one where he fights the Russian guy. There’s a part where Rocky is training really hard and I was like, “Oh shit is this movie about Rocky sucking his own dick?” because it was the same kind of thing.

Janet Cremins (Physical Therapist): I’ve helped Navy SEALS get back on their feet after losing limbs in combat. I helped an NFL player come back from a torn ACL. I can honestly say that no one has ever worked harder in his or her recovery than Marilyn Manson. He was driven by something almost spiritual. It was inspiring. I am moved to tears right now just thinking about it.

Manson: I set a goal date in my mind. By March 30th I wanted that dick in my mouth. I stopped seeing my friends and family. It was Janet and I just constantly rehabbing in the pool. On the morning of the 30th, I had a final checkup with Dr. Foster.

Dr. Foster: He came in for one last visit. The scars had healed. Not just the physical scars but the emotional ones too. When I met him he was “Marilyn Manson.” By the time he left my office he was just Brian to me. He was ready. He was changed.

Cremins: He called me on the way home from Dr. Foster’s. He said, “I’m doing it, Janet. We’re gonna do it! Not literally we but in spirit you’ll be right there next to me.” We both cried. I told him to pull the car over before he got in an accident!

I’ve had sex on a blimp. Not in a blimp, on a blimp. I’ve had sex while being hunted for sport by wealthy oil tycoons. I had sex on the set of Dunston Checks In, twice. This was by far the most satisfying experience of my life. – Marilyn Manson

Marilyn Manson Finally Puts His Dick In His Mouth

With a clean bill of health, Manson speeds home to his estate in the Hollywood Hills. He walks the grounds of his mansion one last time before setting off on the journey. With his lifelong dream — and the dreams of so many who came before him — moments away, he enters his bedroom to do the deed.

Reznor: One time we were sitting around backstage and Brian told me about the happiest day of his childhood. He was 11 years old. His parents took him out out for this fancy dinner after he got the role of Paul Pfeiffer on The Wonder Years. His dad poured him a tiny glass of wine and gave a toast. He said to him, “Brian, I am truly proud of you today.” I felt that way about Brian when he called me and told me the good news about sucking his own dick. It was like the guy had finally reached the Promised Land.

Dr. Foster: He called me afterward to give me the good news. There were no complications, his body was reacting fine and he got that dick all the way into his mouth. Mission accomplished!

Manson: It was everything I dreamed it would be. I’m a pretty open person, sexually. I’ve had sex on a blimp. Not in a blimp, on a blimp. I’ve had sex while being hunted for sport by wealthy oil tycoons. I had sex on the set of Dunston Checks In, twice. This was by far the most satisfying experience of my life. Everything about it was perfect except for the fact that I didn’t particularly like having a dick in my mouth. Oh, and I came in my own mouth which was not great. I guess I hadn’t really thought that part through.