Christopher Hudspeth

You want to have your cake and eat it too.

7. You can do tricks with your face.

When it comes to letting someone know you’re annoyed with an expressionless face, you’re all naturally magical Meryl Streeps.

3. No shave November declarations.

Every 30-second reminder of your loneliness as you shovel scoops of mashed potatoes into your mouth while watching television on your futon begins with Kay.

I will meet you somewhere extravagant. Target. At a matinee showing of a Tyler Perry movie. Applebee’s happy hour.

1. Front camera mode on your phone: 10

9. To some degree worriers are warriors, battling & staving off their constant flow of unpleasant thoughts and concerns as they try to manage a somewhat normal day.

Being a man doesn’t mean you have to smell like a mountain or aqua staleness. There’s a world being hidden from us – open your eyes.

words about the internet and stuff.

3. That can’t-eat, can’t-sleep, reach-for-the-stars, over-the-fence, World Series kind of love.

11. A new message in your Facebook inbox from a crush who you’ve dreamt of dating, but it just turns out to be spam from their freshly hacked account.

The distinct differences between the texts you get from a person who wants to date you and a person who strictly wants to have sex with you.

Clinginess isn’t cute, even when you have a lot to offer.

Some eat to live, but those of us living to eat will take great pleasure in this compilation of things that are terrible and perfect for our heart all at the same time.

Now this is a story all about how
The government got twist-turned upside down

Then, it begins. She goes in her room and slips into something more comfortable. She’s probably already forgotten her boyfriend’s name because she’s too consumed by the thrill and anticipation of the immoral pleasure she’s about to indulge in.

More often than concert tickets or videogames, you enthusiastically purchase boring, cliché adult stuff like a toaster or a shower rod or Tums or light bulbs.