Chrissy Stockton

Outsource the most taxing chore of our time (deciding what to stream tonight) to this infographic.

You went to a liberal arts college and majored in something that people make jokes about.

Chick lit, makeup, pedicures, long bubble baths—these are some of the best parts about being alive. No one questions my manhood because I like to feel good and indulge in life’s little pleasures.

4. You go through a #dark mental space

Your ex is absolutely not an actual crazy person, and if she is, you should probably think of a kinder way to say it.

You could work your entire life to be happy and you will still never attain the level of unadulterated bliss a dog feels when you merely walk in the door.

You can get a boner after you are dead. Current emotion: 2 bleak 2 bone.

You’ll have to read the rest of the magazine through your own tears.

I don’t really understand what the problem is, I’m only appreciating the culture.

The absence of BYOB on your event invitation is the chicest status symbol of our time.

It is not a question of finding an answer to the night of truth but of sitting up with one another through the night.

Unless you are a sex worker and they have paid you, this is not your job.