Christopher Hudspeth

Lurking in the backdrop, capable of abruptly appearing when we least expect it, attacking aggressively before we have time to think – slicing our hearts, and even haunting our dreams.

I started referring to schoolmates using the “n word,” to assure that my blackness be solidified. Unfortunately it was the second most unnatural sounding word out of my mouth, directly behind “aight,” (an alternate pronunciation of the word “alright”).

As for extremely jealous, controlling situations — those typically aren’t going to end well, so walking (or even briskly jogging) away isn’t necessarily a bad idea.

Writing reports? Boring. Writing reports with gel pens and extravagant new led pencils? Meh — not too shabby.

First kisses that have the potential to be last, first kisses.

When you’re starving for their time and attention, this is an opportunity for sustenance. The scraps and crumbs of their busy schedule will serve as nourishment. Very little, but that’s better than nothing.

Don’t be that person who sucks the pleasure out of a friendly game of basketball by angrily throwing the ball, or ruins bowling night, cursing out the pins – then tries to justify it by claiming you’re just “being competitive.”

Horrifying spelling. A text riddled with basic errors can be a deal breaker. Not abbreviations — but messages that look like the Zodiac-killer wrote them and take forever to decode.

Unsolved Mysteries is the reason why I watch my garage door go all the way down – because if I don’t, a killer will most definitely slide under at the last second.

Colored fingertips are the surefire sign of a cheese/spicy flavored chip lover — they basically serve as our badge of honor.

Deciding at some point that you’re simply not going to be productive for the remainder of day.

If a restaurant carries an item with a tasty sounding description, but an extremely difficult name to pronounce, I’ll order a different dish.

Beautiful colored leaves will drop by the masses and cover the ground, making for stunning, scenic appearances. It’ll look like a computer wallpaper everytime you step outside.

I’ve shot airsoft guns, paintball guns, water guns, Nerf guns, staple guns – every type of gun that isn’t actual bullets.

This is quite possibly the most tired I’ve ever felt. I plop into bed. Breathing calmly… easing off into dreamland… Almost out, and then…

Remember those glorious Saturday mornings from your childhood? Rising early, grabbing an oversized bowl of sugary cereal, plopping down on the couch and indulging in classic cartoons was a tradition for many of us.

Go in the refrigerator and pantry, find any food that looks appetizing, and have at it – regardless of who paid for it. Possession is nine tenths of the law, so once it’s in your belly you’re basically all good.

Am I supposed to smile while everybody sings? Or do I modestly laugh? Do I make eye contact with people individually, or glance by all of them? Would it be corny if I did that little orchestra conductor thing? Yeah, that’d be corny.