Please Don’t Fall For Me

I remember how you approached me that early morning, asking if it was okay to drink beer. I glanced at the clock and it was 9:30am. I was trying to devote myself on my MacBook laptop as I wanted to write my articles for my blog that’s been pending for a long time. I said sure of course, I knew most foreigners I’ve met were fans of drinking beer even at the earliest time of the day. Then the conversation began. We chatted a tad, got to know each other and decided to walk our feet off to the beach together intentionally beach bumming and drinking. Well, we really did have a good time. We talked heaps of random stuff, where we’re from, what we do, what interests us and so on.

It was almost a halfway fantastic day and then we plumped for the town, looked for pancakes and hoped to see the waterfall. Unfortunately, the locals said it already dried out so we had no choice but to go back to our hostel and watched a movie at the common area, with a beer on our hands (of course). We met another two new friends who joined us for a happy time with the sense of slowed down all together all afternoon ended the day watched the sunset on the beach, full board dinner and endless drink ’til the dawn. We were ordinary people with different stories, learning the uniqueness of each other. It was awesome.

Two days later I came back to the city, you sent me a message that you’re coming to Baler for surfing, unluckily for you, the last bus already departed at 7am. It was 4pm, you were in the middle of the bus station slash a little bit dangerous place as you described, everything that surrounded you was completely new to you, even thinking to yourself you’re in danger. To my kindness, I rescued you to just come by and stay at my condo to kill time before heading off to your destination. I remembered that you said, “Cathy, save me!” I laughed. It was actually funny having a stranger complaining about missing his bus but I’m glad I saved your life.

We killed time through drinking beer, continuing to teach me how to swim. You were a very patient kind of guy that even though I almost gave up, you on the other hand never did. I know most people think it’s ridiculous that most Filipinos live in the Philippines surrounded by 7,107 islands yet they don’t know how to swim. I didn’t care. It was perfectly a good time to spend with someone who is a complete stranger that I can even trust and allow to stay over in my own private space. I even thought you were a dangerous guy. haha! But you were alright. Proved me wrong in all ways, you are fun to be with, kind and have a pure thoughtful heart.

Between our fun times together, I felt the connection between the two of us. You have stacks of cool stories that I’ve never heard of – from having two big huskies at your friend’s apartment to owning and living in a van traveling around, owning a big boat and sailing the coast of Australia and more. You’re extremely adventurous! I thought you’re the craziest guy after hearing your stories! Not to mention, you’re indeed a crackerjack! You’re talented, you can play the guitar, ukulele, you sing reggae well plus you’re a surfer! A very artistic person that you even painted my fingernails and toenails with green nail polish topped with glitters, folded the blanket and rolled my yoga mat with zero hesitations. You don’t fuss at the thought of eating by hands like a Filipino and even had dried fish for breakfast. Moreso, you’re a very appreciative guy.

In the middle of everything, I knew somehow, you developed your feelings for me, the way you looked at me in the eyes, the way you treated me, everything you’ve done for me has a beautiful meaning and I’m glad that we stayed right we were supposed to be and didn’t let ourselves do stupid things that could possibly hurt some people that we love, especially on my side. Thank you for respecting my territory.

On the other side, knowing that I am a girl in a serious committed long distance relationship with my beau from Sweden, that didn’t stop us from being good buddies. We went on a significant overnight camping together, attended a music and lights festival in the mountain, and gave me the reasons to break away from my four-cornered room. We were like a real couple that even other people would always have had mistaken us a husband and wife. And I always just smiled in return and pretended that we actually were.

I’m glad we’ve met, glad that I’ve met someone like you, like you always say, not only saving your day but also being you and me but never an us, an imaginary lover that always did work out in all ways.

Thank you for knowing your place and remaining to be a good friend of mine, for giving me bits of advice on how to do things the way it should be done, for everything. Thank you for adding adventures into my life, and I’ll never forget the funny and indescribable face you had when I asked you to eat two pieces of “tuyo” (dried fish) when I served you a big amount of rice on your plate for breakfast.

I know that in the end, it was hard for you not to fall for me, we’ve spent really lovely times together but we should also not be selfish. Falling in love is an easy thing to do, but hurting other people’s feelings should be considered, too. We are not selfish people. Lastly, as I always say, please don’t fall for me, I can’t take responsibility. Even though we remain friends, I will forever cherish the good times we spent together like we were a real lover. I hope you have a wonderful journey ahead.

Until we cross paths again my sweet dear.