To The One I No Longer Care About

Just as you hadn't cared about me when I needed you most, I can now say the same with jubilation.

By

Swaraj Tiwari
Swaraj Tiwari
Swaraj Tiwari

Hey, you. You, the one who once stole my heart and brought magic into my life. You, the man who silently crept into my life and showed up with a bouquet of roses. You, the man who I thought would be the one I’d settle down with. You, my former favorite person whom I wanted to spend endless hours with.

Hi.

I wanted to let you know that I no longer care about you and honestly, it feels great!

You may not know this, but I waited for months to reach this point. I had to endure sorrowful days and cold nights trying to get over you. You never cared what happened to me after you walked away, but I did. It took many restless nights to realize that you leaving was the best thing to ever happen, a blessing in fact.

I would often cry in the shower trying to figure out why you never came back. There were frequent moments where I felt choked by the memories of us. I spent hours concocting ideas on how to attract your attention. I spent weeks feeling the pain of a shattered heart while you gaily carried on with your life, oblivious that you were the source of that pain.

While I never quite understood how you were able to look at yourself in the mirror without feeling any guilt or shame days after we parted ways, I want you to know that it’s all in the past now.

Those thoughts are no longer relevant because you are no longer inhabiting my heart or my life.

I want you to know that it feels really good for me to not be affected by what takes place in your life, what you post on your Instagram feed, and to be blatantly ignored by you. Your silence empowers me, your pride strengthens me, and your oblivious ways constantly has me laughing.

See while you immediately scouted for a new woman to call your own, I had to nurture my injured heart and broken soul. Whilst it was easy for you to turn your back on what we had (after all, it was me who ended it), it was even easier for you to not admit that your actions contributed to the demise of our relationship.

Just as you hadn’t cared about me when I needed you most, I can now say the same with jubilation.

Hey, you. I know there are days when you miss talking to me and having me around. I also know that it’s not fun living this life feeling unsure on whether you made the right decision. It’s especially difficult when you force yourself to deny your heart’s wish of giving “us” another shot. Well, I just wanted to remind you that life goes on and so have I.

Please don’t misinterpret the fact that I still write about you for caring. Instead you should view it as progress because I’ve waited for months to feel this excitement I have in my heart! You know why I feel this exhilarated?

Because you gave me every reason in the book to no longer care about you only this time I truly don’t. Thought Catalog Logo Mark


About the author

Cantika Rustandi

Storyteller by nature and oversharing details is my forte.