We all know self-care is the newest fade. AND it’s not a bad thing, we all need it and it’s about time the world realized the necessity for taking care of others also involves taking care of thyself. With this post, we’re going to keep it simple and discuss 3 ways to do and 3 ways to not do self-care.

Let’s start with the DO’S

1. Do take time alone to process feelings. We can do this a multitude of ways such a listening to soothing music, journaling, exercising, and of course talking to friends to name a few. A lot of people skip over taking a pause and getting in tune with what’s going on with them. Avoidance of how you’re feeling isn’t taking care of yourself or protecting yourself as I’ve heard clients say. It’s really just delaying the inevitable. Suppressing these emotions does damage to the body as a lot of us know and these emotions at times come out in odd ways at times. I won’t lecture you, I have a knack for that BUT all I’m saying is pop a squat and commit to knowing and validating your feelings

2. Do ask for help when you need it. Self-care isn’t just about the self as it states it can be knowing when you need to reach out. Also, knowing what kind of help you need. Does this mean talking with a friend or possibly investing in a therapist? This could also mean investing in medication management or checking yourself into the hospital for some time. Acknowledge that something isn’t right is a part of taking care of yourself. If you had the flu you wouldn’t think twice about reaching out for help, this is no different.

3. Do things that make you feel good. Dancing, singing, writing, all the things that put even a half-smile on your face. Papa always says when you look good you feel good, well I think I look pretty good with a smile on my face so I’m going to commit to keeping it there.

Now onto the DON’Ts

1. Don’t use self-care as a reason to buys things you can’t afford. That will create an even bigger issue…trust me. AND your problem will still be there after you buy the thing…can you believe that? I had this habit bad, I’d always want to eat when I had a bad day and it wasn’t like Wendy’s like I wanted to go out to dinner get whatever I wanted and as soon as I was done eating it was like…..the problem still remains. I’ve figured out how I’m better off just dealing with whatever’s bringing me down whether directly or emotionally.

2. Don’t think self-care is just about bubble baths and candles, that’s part of the deal but its bigger than that. Using relaxing things such as bubble baths and candles is good for the senses and I’ve indulged in these things. BUT we can’t forget that it doesn’t always do the trick to solve the issue at hand. This is what I would call a distraction technique, distancing yourself from the problem by using relaxation… just don’t forget to come back to the problem and cope with it.

3. Don’t be embarrassed to put yourself first and tell people you need a break from socializing or you need to cancel plans. Keep that corny thought in your head “Can’t help you if I can’t help me.” I strictly function on quotes so this one as simple as it is, gets me every time!