Brandon Scott Gorrell

I am the co-publisher of Thought Catalog. Follow me on Twitter. I also use a pen name called Holden Desalles.

4chan’s Anonymous Release Video Response To Recent Bank Hacks

“The unjust restrictions you impose on us will meet with disaster and only strengthen our resolve to disobey… Such actions taken against you and those you outsource your malignant litigation to are inevitable and unavoidable and unstoppable. We are Anonymous. We are legion divided by zero. We do not forgive internet censorship and we do not forget free speech,” Anon’s synthetic voice warns. Video inside.

Tommy Lee Angry at Sea World for Masturbating Whales

“…the way you get his sperm is by having someone get into the pool and masturbate him with a cow’s vagina filled with hot water. Even during my wildest days at Motley Crue, I never could’ve imagined something so sick and twisted.” Read Tommy Lee’s full letter to Sea World inside.

Meet Shannon, the Incredibly Surreal Schizophrenic

“I’ve got a yellow spider, I get everybody says they haven’t seen one yet, I got it trapped in a bottle, a jar, with sealing wax over. But you know how spiders are, y’know, they’re kinda tricky motherfuckers. Excuse my language. Plus I have an organic substance that came out of the sky, if you’re interested in helping me out to try to extract ’em…”

How My Girlfriend Sees Me Vs. How My Friends See Me

I don’t use public showers i.e. in gyms or swimming pools that require a membership and prefer not to piss openly in front of others (actually I can’t) so any penis ‘flashing’ my friends might have been subject to has been merely coincidental and unintentional and left unmentioned.

Here is Your Chance to Seriously Gawk at Rural America

Not really sure what there is to be said in this kind of situation. I feel baffled. Guess this is like the ‘spoken word’ of rural Illinois? Watch the uncanny video of the 2010 Illinois State Fair Hog Calling Contest after the jump.

A Final Roundup of This Year’s Black Friday Madness

Stampedes in malls and consumers fiercely defending a cardboard-packaged-whatever at Walmart is trashy as a general rule, but footage in this video montage of Black Friday sale-stampeding takes the cake. Watch it inside.

Juggalos Hold First Ever Toy Drive Because They Also Care About the Children

It’s called the Super Live Toy Drive, a “time for sharing, caring, and getting drunk as fuck and blew out.” Why the uncharacteristic Juggalo display of love for children? Because “the kids want shit. They want mad shit. They want shit like extra expensive super Wiis, and nuclear nerf guns.” Watch the video inside.