Brandon Scott Gorrell

Since the glorification of all/ most of these are generally frowned upon nowadays (in the Age of Irony and Equality), people who love Hemingway secretly appreciate and/ or fantasize about the way the world used to be; about being Hemingway’s Brett, or his Catherine, or Hemingway himself…

OOPS. This F-Bomb was dropped yesterday at noon; hopefully she and her colleagues have recovered from the devastating impact and weathered the fallout without sustaining casualty and/ or loss of life.

Really, Tennessee? Apparently the state has just passed a law making it illegal to post pics that could “frighten, intimidate or cause emotional distress” to the viewer. Questions for Tennessee: 1) how are you going to enforce this law? 2) how are you going to interpret this law? and 3) What the hell?

This week in Alamogordo, New Mexico, a man who apparently wanted to get back at his ex-girlfriend for aborting their unborn child ran a billboard that reads “This Would Have Been A Picture Of My 2-Month Old Baby If The Mother Had Decided To Not KILL Our Child!” Next to the text is the man – 35-year-old Greg Fultz – holding a black silhouette of an infant in his arms.

Ouch. A recent show in Amsterdam had Moby a little too close to the gallery’s track lighting, which I’m assuming provides electricity for its light bulbs via exposed electrical wires. Anyways, kind of weird/ scary seeing Moby go down for the count like that! Apparently, dude’s ok, and later tweeted that he was “sorry for being electrocuted” and that he was “feeling much better.” Thank god.

Finally, I’ll probably want to avoid you forever if you’re the type of person who hangs out with people because they’re Cool. I accept the notion that there exist Cool and Uncool people, but contrary to your beliefs, people can be stratified in different ways. There are different categories people fall into.

Questions: 1. Why? 2. That looks like it took a lot of time and money. Did it? 3. Please tell me why. 4. Here is my idea: your sleeve is a metaphor for Facebook’s tendency to help us define ourselves. By getting a full sleeve of your friend’s profile pictures, you’re sarcastically making the statement: “Look, Facebook defines me, too.” Sort of a cynic’s stance, am I right?

You can impress me if it’s obvious to me that you’re interesting in a way that I can’t quite describe; if it’s obvious to me that you understand the world in an exciting way that I’m not fully able to comprehend. Therefore, I shouldn’t really be able to predict a good amount of your behavior, and so spending time together will be fun and interesting for me.

In Berlin last Friday a girl only identified as “Thessa” accidentally held a party for her 16th birthday that brought 1,500 young people, over 100 policemen, firefighters, and two small fires. Police spokesman Mirko Streiber told the press on Sunday that the size of the party caused Thessa to go into hiding, but that it was nevertheless “a hit.”

In a move that smells a bit like cultural oppression, The Fort Worth Transportation Authority in Fort Worth, Texas has recently instituted a ban on saggy pants. You heard right – if you’re a person that wears your pants below your ass, you’re not going to be allowed on the buses in Fort Worth.

Facebook helps you feel embarrassed for others upon seeing them logically defeated on someone’s Wall in a political argument during which unseemly amounts of nationalism, pro life beliefs, faith and/or rage are displayed.

Sometimes we require a break from all the aloofness, irony and sarcasm so we can genuinely enjoy the spectacle of a tiny human being’s curiosity. His name is Teddy, and according to his dad, the cameraman, Teddy enjoys “all kinds of fish whether they be salmon, large mouth bass, small mouth bass, catfish, goldfish, pike, trout and many others.”

Yes, you heard right. No more created-by-food-producers food pyramid for us ‘mericans! Remember? The one that taught us that a requirement for every heathy individual was daily dairy, meat and bread intake? Today, with the help of Michelle Obama, the USDA has announced that its food pyramid is going to be replaced by… a plate!

After college, you’re thrusted into the real world to Find A Job and Be Self Sufficient, and in turn, you become aware that the people in this world think binge drinking after college actually = alcoholism and a potential sign that one doesn’t have her shit together.

Customers are the gods of the food service industry, and they’re angry gods at that; when one is even slightly dissatisfied, apologies pour from over the counter in a tidal wash of discounts, refunds, coupons, sincere hopes for reconciliation and a plea to please, please don’t let this one minor mistake reflect upon our business as a whole, please come back again.

But as the foul ball nears, something goes awry; perhaps dad becomes so fixated on the prospect of catching the foul ball that he forgets he’s holding a human, perhaps dad simply wants to be the one to catch the ball.

From the same videographer, Terje Sorgjerd, that brought us other stunning timelapse videos of nature, this bliss-inducing timelapse features locations throughout Norway’s archipelago Lofoten. The phenomenon here seen is what Sorgjerd calls “Arctic Light” – the period of time during which there is hardly any night to speak of.

BSG: What do you think about me peeing with the door open? GF: Um… [drinks coffee]. I don’t really mind if you pee with door open. I guess I think it’s kind of funny. I don’t have a very strong opinion about it… I think I have a stronger opinion about myself peeing with the door open.