Your Pain Demands To Be Felt, So Feel It

Let the pain be felt. Let it last long, let it linger, let it live with you for a while. Feel the pain; embrace it until you turn numb. Let it in and make it stay before you let it all go.

Let the pain remain a little longer. Let the pain stay, especially if you know that’s the only memory you’ll ever spend with him because you know that’s the only thing connecting the two of you. Because you know that if being hurt stops, it’s also the end of everything you fought for, everything you believe was right, every waking moment you thought was magic.

Pain demands to be felt. It does not want to be denied. You fight it, it fights back. You hit it, it hits you harder. You try to convince yourself that being okay is easy, that telling people you are fine is easier than telling them you’re hurting. But maybe we should not force ourselves to be okay, at least not quickly; we do not have to pretend that we are done and over with everything that happened when we are really not.

We tend to think that it’s effective, that denial is the best road to moving on, when it’s not and it has never been a cure. Denial leads to suppression of emotions, and when we suppress, these feelings turn into emotional beasts that demand they be released from their cages, from our hearts. By that time, we will only feel more pain.

Pain is inevitable. If it is a necessity to be so hurt and then turn numb afterwards, then so be it. However, don’t let it change us; we only have to learn from it. We have to understand that things are not always going to be aligned with our plans because everything that occurs in our life and how they will come and go is never our call.

Don’t deny the people who hurt us the pleasure of watching us suffer so when we are finally free from the trap they set to capture us, they will witness it. They will see that the person they left for someone or something else will turn out to be the person they have always desired. Be glad that these people made their entrances and exits memorable; be fond of the idea that they happened, even if they didn’t last as long as we hoped and prayed.

Let the pain remain for a little while. It might hurt now, but we are going to be okay. We have always been good about lifting other people up, and it’s time to do this for ourselves. If all good things come to an end, what makes us think that the bad things don’t?

Stand—be still.