Hello To My Fears

Hello fears
Racing into my home, uninvited
Yet here you are

You stop me dead in my tracks
Filling up my body with what ifs
Picturing everything that could go wrong
You blanket over me all the outcomes I haven’t yet considered
I should just stay in bed today, wouldn’t that be easier?

You show me what will happen

Hello insecurities
Creeping into my cracked bathroom mirror, as I get ready for the day

Looking back at me, locking eyes, so I can’t look away
You tell me all the ways that I’m not enough
Remembering all the things that I wish I could change
Yes, I know my hair doesn’t lay flat
Yes, I’m aware of the zit on my chin

You show me what I’m missing

Hello self-doubt
The one who seems to knows me best

Sitting across from me on my worn, yellow couch
You remind me of how I might fail
You stare me down, remembering all the times I already have
Inching closer now, you whisper reasons to give up
Placing all your weight on me so I can barely breathe

You show me what I’m capable of

You come in here, like an old friend
Making yourself comfortable

You make so much noise, I can hardly hear myself think
Hoping I’ll drop what I’m doing and spend the day with you
Distracting me from getting anything done
From going on that interview
From taking that much needed vacation
From writing that book

But you don’t need to leave
It’s okay if you stay

I suppose I need you here
To show me what I really want
To show me what it will take

To fight

You show me who I am

Hello fears
Racing into my home, uninvited
Yet here you are