The 5 Biggest Reasons Our Relationships Always Seem To Fail

Stop bringing past arguments into current circumstances. When you use situations from the past as a weapon, you're inadvertently soliciting resentment in your relationship.

By

Jez Timms
Jez Timms

We’re unable to compromise.

Compromising is making the conscious choice to accept each other for exactly who you are, and appreciating who that is. Sometimes you fail to compromise because you’re unconsciously thinking of yourself and your needs, and we’re definitely all guilty of it from time to time. Realize that you don’t always have to be right. Relationships are about understanding and taking ownership when we’re wrong. Let things go. When you make a mistake, take full responsibility for it. Make conscious changes to ensure that it won’t happen again in the future. Compromising in a relationship isn’t always going to be 50/50. Once you fully accept that idea, you will understand how to make compromise a foremost priority in all of your relationships.

We let trust issues from the past deteriorate our current relationship.

There’s always a part of the past that you don’t like to revisit or think about often. When you use issues from a previous relationship as an excuse as to why a current or future relationship isn’t going to work, you’re only cheating yourself. A failed relationship isn’t a reason to fear a new one. When you do decide to go through with a relationship, it’s important to have complete trust, not only in that person, but in yourself, too. When you take a leap of faith, you will be able to give it your all and truly let go of all inhibitions so that the relationship has an honest chance of survival.

We stop trying.

It’s easy to get caught up in other parts of life- school, friends, family, careers, whatever the case might be. We somehow forget how to properly balance and manage all aspects of our life and sometimes it puts a strain on our relationships. When you both neglect to put in effort it likely will result in a feeling of distance and confusion with one another. In order to have a successful relationship, you must never stop putting in effort. Do it because you want to, not because you feel like you’re reputed to.

We avoid conflict.

When an issue arises, we don’t know how to appropriately express our emotions. Sweeping things under the rug seems to be the easiest route to take, and it’s ultimately where we run into the most problems. If you aren’t able to properly communicate with your partner, your relationship will suffer as a result. Instead of discussing stuff right away when it bothers us, we tend to avoid it until it blows up into one massive, awful fight. If we learn how to hash out a situation as it is happening, we’re able to avoid major arguments in the future. Stop bringing past arguments into current circumstances. When you use situations from the past as a weapon, you’re inadvertently soliciting resentment in your relationship. When you learn how to communicate painful emotions, you’re stepping outside of your comfort zone and into a wonderful learning and growth opportunity for not only your relationship, but for yourself as an individual.

We don’t share the same values- socially, politically, and morally.

This goes back to the idea that compromise makes a relationship strong. But sometimes, possessing extremely different values can play a major factor in the deterioration of a relationship. Having an open mind and being understanding are key for a long-lasting relationship. If you don’t agree with whatever it is your partner is saying, take a moment and try to view things from their perspective. Accept that you aren’t going to always agree with each other but if you’re able to agree to disagree then you’re able to do just about anything. Thought Catalog Logo Mark