When You Need To Accept That Love Isn’t Enough To Make It Work

There’s a moment when you feel that it’s over. It’s just over. Somewhere down the line it went wrong and you just can’t do it anymore. And it doesn’t mean someone was bad. It’s not how you expected it to go but it happened and you’re crushed. Mostly because you were sure that this was it this time.

You go back to the first time you saw that person. She was swaying her hips drunkenly to the music at your friend’s party. Or he was standing at the bar with his friends, laughing at something one of them had said. Either way you remember that butterfly feeling and it makes you nostalgic for the better times. The times when nothing mattered except having to know their name. Wanting to know to touch their face. Craving to feel their lips on yours.

And by some divine miracle you ended up meeting. Whether you worked up the courage eventually to tap them on the shoulder or you bumped into each other later on in the night, you met and it was exactly what you thought it was going to be. It was an instant feeling of pure joy that made you feel incredibly cheesy thinking that these were the moments in life that you live for. It was the buzzing that you felt throughout your entire body after the first kiss that sealed everything.

Then you dive in head first. There were no games. No pretending that you didn’t like each other. In your friend’s minds, you were both borderline obsessed with each other. God who doesn’t like that? Just feeling the extreme highs that come with getting into a relationship with another person who feels the exact same way you do.

We hear about the relationships that end because of cheating or some other major issue but we rarely hear of the ones that just fizzle out. That there isn’t anyone to blame, it’s just over.

And those are the saddest to me. The ones where both partners just can’t figure out why it’s not working anymore. Why they don’t feel the same way that they did before.

You both know too. That there’s something just a little off. That things are just a little too forced lately. That even seeing them naked doesn’t get you as stoked as it used too. And it used to get you extremely stoked. And you feel bad. Because it has nothing to do with them or their body and everything to do with where you’re at. And where they’re at. Because you both know you’re going through the motions instead of feeling.

No matter how much you love the person it sometimes just doesn’t work. And it’s nothing they did. Nothing you said. Nothing at all that really contributed to the break. You just have your path and they have theirs. And unfortunately yours just don’t intertwine. They don’t magically end up together.

It still hurts. When things just don’t work out. It hurts like hell because there really is no real reason other than the fact that you just don’t fit together.

So you both pick up the pieces of your hearts and try to repair them in the ways that you know how to.

Eventually you go to another party or bar and look up to see someone new who gives you that same butterfly feeling you had before. And that excitement reminds you why love is so great. No matter what happened before, in that moment you remember why you let yourself fall in love in the first place.

And that feeling alone is worth it. It just is.