When You’re Looking For Your Soulmate
There’s a boy in Houston, Texas who tells me that he loves me.
There’s a hotel room in Louisville, Kentucky where I remembered what it was like to be so lonely.
Somewhere in Miami, there’s a boy I thought I would have forever.
And when I met him on the green line, I lost a part of myself that I don’t think I will ever get back.
I have spent the past three years wishing that I didn’t love you,
But I have never been one for those things to come true.
This ring sits crooked on my finger, and I don’t think I will ever get this right.
I tried to love a married man, but homewrecker did not fit any better.
Even when you were halfway across the world, you never felt further than when you were sleeping right there next to me.
One night I turned away from you, and deep down, I knew that things would never be the same again.
One night you turned away from me, and in that moment I knew it was the end.
I drive these sleepy streets of suburbia searching for something I don’t think I will ever find.
There is always the promise of “this time it will be better.”
But what nobody tells you is that better is not always enough.
Maybe they are nicer, smarter, and just so much more.
Maybe this one is a gentleman and always calls you by name.
But maybe that still doesn’t make them right for you.
Maybe you can check off all of the boxes and still not finish your list.
Maybe they can be the best thing that’s ever happened to you, but things still won’t feel right.
A soulmate is someone who just fits into your life.
If you face this much resistance now, imagine what the rest of your life will be.
Struggles will happen, but you shouldn’t have to change yourself to make it work.
Sometimes you can find all of the right pieces, but it still doesn’t work.
Please don’t force something you don’t truly believe in because no amount of trying will ever make it right.
If it isn’t okay, then it isn’t the end.
Please don’t let this be your end.