Don’t Fall In Love With Someone Who Invalidates Your Idea Of Love

You want daydreams and soft love and kisses and kindness. You want candlelight and walks in the rain. You don’t want sex, you want to make love. You want romance, the kind of romance that they showcase in films, but sadly, you are with someone who will never give you any of those things because they are, as you convince yourself, a realist. Besides, you rationalise, your expectations are unreal, your expectations are too large, you want too much, you are needy, clingy and what you need to be is cool.

So you pack away your dreams, your fantasies, your walks on the beach, your sugar spun fantasies, dismissing them as childish. Instead you settle for watching movies and going out once in a while. You settle for a sometimes cooked dinner as a thank you. You settle for not celebrating an anniversary or two.

Stop. This is not the love you deserve because this is not the love you want. Yes, real love requires adjustment, but you do not need to lower your expectations to this extent to make someone love you. You do not need to change your idea of love to fit someone else’s needs. What if I told you there is someone out there who will give you the love you need? Someone who doesn’t see romance as an unrealistic fantasy?

And here you are settling for someone who won’t even leave their sofa when you need help in the kitchen, or in the garden, or even to fix a shelf in your home.

Do not do yourself this injustice.

Fall in love with someone who deserves your soft love. Find someone who gives you the love you need.

Fall in love with someone who can’t stop thinking about you, who will surprise you with sweet good morning texts and sometimes leaving your favourite chocolates for you.

Fall in love with someone who validates your feelings about romance. find someone who feels as strongly about love as you do.

Fall in love with someone who welcomes your storms as much as your sunny days.

Fall in love with someone who values you and doesn’t make you denigrate your dreams and needs for them.

But most importantly find someone who values you.

You get one life in this world. Just one. And it is far too short and far too hard to waste it on someone who invalidates how warm and soft and gentle and deserving you are of the kind of love you need.

Fall in love with someone who makes you feel important and special every single day. Promise me you will not settle for anything less than that.