10 Common Sense Dating Rules We Could All Use A Reminder About
Don't change who you are to impress someone. It's not worth it. You aren't going to be for everyone and that is okay, just like everyone isn't for you. That doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you. Be who you are and the right person will like you just for that.
By Becca Martin
1. If someone makes you uncomfortable in any way possible, it isn’t worth it. Even if you haven’t met them in person yet! If they give you weird vibes through dating apps then it’s not worth pursuing even if you already said yes. You can ALWAYS change your mind. The most important thing is that you’re safe.
2. Never go out with someone just because you don’t want to be alone. This is an awful reason to start talking to someone. Don’t just look for someone who will be a little quick fix in your mind because that’s only going to hurt them and possibly you. Don’t take advantage of other people’s feeling because you wouldn’t like it if someone else did it to you. Just a general reminder to keep in mind is you’re not the only one with feelings and you’re not the only one who experiences pain/hurt.
3. If you have to talk yourself not liking someone it will never work. Never, never, never. I’ve tried. It doesn’t work. Don’t go out with someone and then keep agreeing to see them when you’re not interested. If you don’t like them from the start you probably won’t ever really like them. If you have to convince yourself to like them because you know they really like you do them a favor and let them know you’re not into them because they’re the only one who is going to get hurt. And again, your feelings aren’t the only ones that matter.
4. If someone asks you to/for something you don’t feel comfortable with don’t do it. This goes for sending pictures, saying things, doing things that you aren’t sure about. Don’t allow anyone to pressure you into things that make you uncomfortable. If they really care about you they’ll respect you enough to not force you into it. Otherwise, it’s not worth it.
5. You don’t have to say yes just because someone asked you on a date. Someone asking you on a date doesn’t require a yes. If you don’t see it fit then don’t date the person. A little rejection is good for everyone every once in a while.
6. No is always an acceptable response. No is a sentence and you should use it whenever you feel is appropriate.
7. Don’t change who you are to impress someone. It’s not worth it. You aren’t going to be for everyone and that is okay, just like everyone isn’t for you. That doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you. Be who you are and the right person will like you just for that. The real you is enough so don’t try to be someone you’re not because they could also dislike that person but they would have fallen for the real you.
8. Don’t make yourself uncomfortable to make someone else more comfortable. Please, don’t do this. You matter and so does how comfortable you are. You’re allowed to take up space and you’re allowed to put yourself first. The person you’re on a date with is not more important than you, neither is their level of comfort. You deserve to feel comfortable too.
9. Don’t let anyone try to “fix” or attempt to change you. Especially if you’re in the early stages of dating. If someone is trying to give you advice on how you should eat or dress or whatever it is then they’re not the right person for you. We all have bad habits but no one should be calling you out on it during a first date experience. They’ve got their flaws too but you’re not picking them apart.
10. Trust your gut. Your gut feeling is usually right. If you get a bad vibe or don’t think things are panning out the way you expected – leave. Always leave. Call someone, share your location, don’t worry about being rude because your safety matters most, not someone’s feelings who are making you fearful.