There Is No Such Thing As Ruining Your Life — You Only Get Stronger From Your Mistakes

There is no such thing as ruining your life. There, I said the words. Now let me explain why this concept does not exist. First of all, human beings are designed to make errors. We are designed to make mistakes, to fall down, to hurt ourselves. Do you know why? Because mistakes are the only way we truly learn about who we are on the inside.

It is by making great big mistakes that we learn how much strength we have within ourselves. It is by making huge errors that we learn how to dust ourselves off and start again. And it is by making mistakes that we learn what life is.

These words “You have ruined your life” or “I have ruined my life” serve a finality. It means that what you have done is unfixable. There is nothing you can do to repair it. But the truth is that sentence should be followed by something which will forever change your perspective on your life. “I have ruined my life, for now. Now how do I fix it?”

By all means, grieve. You messed up. You lost someone you love because of a mistake you made. You lost a job because of a bad decision. There are uncountable ways that you have managed to changed your life for the negative but do you know what? At the end of the day, that is what personal growth is about.

Without making mistakes, without losing things we care for, without honestly reaching rock bottom, how are we supposed to learn or know or grow from the things that have hurt us, destroyed us or changed us?

Think of it this way, my darling. You are a forest. Within you, there are numerous beautiful things, birds that are of such magnificent colours, plants that are stunningly gorgeous in every single way, animals that can astound the human eye with their magnificence, Not a single one of them was made in error. Sometimes, this forest catches fire and these beautiful creatures must take flight, run away, lose their homes. But there is something about a forest fire few know. That it is from the ashes that a stronger, more dense, more beautiful forest grows.

From your mistakes, my darlings, from the pit you find yourself in, from the terrible devastation from which you believe you will never ever recover, you will realise that you have the capacity to sow roots and grow. And grow and grow until you are whole again.

There is no such thing in this world as ruining your life. Because personal growth is so addictive. When you realise that all your mistakes are lessons, there is no end to the amazing things you can achieve, there is no end to the wonderful things you can do.

Nikita Gill is a poet and the author of the book Your Soul Is A River.

Your Soul Is A River is available as a physical and electronic book. You can buy it here.