The Brutal Truth About Why You’re So Hard On Yourself, Based On Your Zodiac Sign

Aries

(March 21st to April 19th)

People love to be around you because you have so much joie de vivre. You are lively and adventurous — but inside, you worry if people would like the real you without all the excitement. This same zeal for adventure makes you super competitive. It’s hard not to turn these qualities inward and jump all over yourself when you don’t meet your own (super high) expectations. You’re hard on yourself because you spend so much time trying to be the best at whatever is important to you. Even if you started doing something because you really loved the activity, at the end of the day you’re measuring yourself against everyone else.

Taurus

(April 20th to May 21st)

Selective Taurus puts everything they have into a relationship when they finally decide the object of their affection is worth it. The shadow side of going all in, however, is that it’s hard to ever lose the paranoia of wondering if it’s worth it — or if you’ll foolishly lose it all. You’re hard on yourself because you’re hyper-aware of people’s motives. You choose to be loyal and respectful to those you put your trust in because that’s what your values are — but what about everyone else? Being a Taurus can feel an awful lot like waiting around to get hurt over and over again.

Gemini

(May 22nd to June 21st)

Gemini are quirky friends who people flock to because they are passionate and fun-loving. Deep inside, however, Gemini worry that they’re too different from everyone else. They tend to get swept up in relationships or hobbies or whatever other kind of new passions, but it makes it hard to focus on any one thing — so they can become insecure that they are incapable of putting down roots. You are hard on yourself because you worry about your ability to commit to anything — a boyfriend or girlfriend, a career, a city to grow a life in. When you haven’t settled down, it can feel like it will never happen.

Cancer

(June 22nd to July 22nd)

Cancers are the most loving sign in the zodiac. They can deplete their own energy stores nurturing and supporting those around them before they tend to themselves. It doesn’t make them feel angry or bitter, they love that they are so able to be generous with their affection. Deep inside, however, they fear that no one will ever love them as much as the Cancer has loved their partners. You are hard on yourself because you know the full capacity of what is available in a relationship, and the hard truth is that non-Cancers simply don’t feel that all these things are of such utmost importance. You’re not sure if you’re stupid for loving other people so much regardless of what you get in return.

Leo

(July 23rd to August 22nd)

Because Leos so value the opinion of others, it’s very easy to get sucked into a low self-worth spiral when you’re in a compliment drought. You just want to please other people, why should it be so complicated? You’re hard on yourself because you have a burning desire for other people to think you are good enough, and it’s very hard to get enough of the right kind of feedback to fill this void. All of this comes from an altruistic place: making people happy, it sucks that it can be something that makes you so unhappy.

Virgo

(August 23rd to September 22nd)

Virgos are the hardest workers in the zodiac. They have big dreams (even if they seem weird or boring to others) and they have all the focus and persistence they need to pull it off. The problem is that along with this comes the backbone of a Virgo’s personality, they are painstakingly perfectionists. You are hard on yourself because you know you can do better than whatever you are currently doing. With such a high degree of potential comes the guilt of anything less than wild success.

Libra

(September 23rd to October 22nd)

Libras make amazing friends and tend to get along with everyone. They have a talent for making people feel good and tend to have large social circles where they get along with everyone. While this is important to you, at times you value other people (and other people’s opinions) more than you value yourself. Because your friends are so important to you, you’re extra sensitive when any conflict arises. You’re hard on yourself because you value your relationships and reputation so much, you have a lot to lose if anything goes wrong.

Scorpio

(October 23rd to November 22nd)

Scorpios are the strongest sign in the zodiac. They make themselves into powerful people who don’t take shit from anyone. Inside however, they wonder if their exterior is too hard for them to be lovable. Especially for Scorpios who take every little thing super seriously, this perceived weakness is almost unforgivable. Scorpio, you’re hard on yourself because it’s so hard for you to be vulnerable. Every time you’re anything less than impenetrable and perfect, it seems like the end of the world.

Sagittarius

(November 23rd to December 21st)

Sagittarians are happy people who are beloved by their inner circle because they can put anyone in a better mood. They are adventurous, love travel, and guard their independence fiercely. It’s not always known that they have commitment issues because they get on so well with almost everyone, but it’s there. If you’re a Sagittarius, you’re likely hard on yourself because you worry about settling. While you love people and want a relationship, you don’t want to be tied down to someone you perceive as too possessive of you. You don’t even want to commit to a city, when you know there are adventures to be had elsewhere.

Capricorn

(December 22nd to January 20th)

Capricorn’s aspirations for their life are sky-high. They have the best taste and have an expectation of themselves that one day they’ll achieve. If you’re a Capricorn, you’re hard on yourself because you’re terrified of failing. In all likelihood that’s not in the cards for you — you’re not dumb and you don’t lack focus — but a Capricorn’s definition of “failing” tends to be a little wider than everyone else’s.

Aquarius

(January 21st to February 18th)

Aquarians are smarties with huge hearts. They care about the welfare of others and actively work to make the world a better place for everyone to exist. They are deep thinkers, and extremely compassionate. If you’re an Aquarius, you’re hard on yourself because you’ve never felt like you fit in with everyone else. Though you’re able to empathize with others, you’re not always able to understand how they can seem so much more cold-hearted than you can imagine yourself being. It doesn’t seem possible that anyone could simply not care about others as much as you do.

Pisces

(February 19th to March 20th)

Pisces are the consumate loners. They’re fine embracing their independence and doing their own thing. The world is full of curiosities the Pisces loves to explore: art, travel, food. But being independent all the time can be exhausting. You’re hard on yourself because you’re constantly paving your own path forward. Your life is so much less comfortable than everyone else who can follow set milestones and whose lives are easily understood by their family and friends. While you wouldn’t have it any other way, it’d be nice to have some company once in awhile.