You’re An Asshole, But I Miss You Like Crazy Anyway

You’re a liar, a manipulator, and a shitty excuse for a man. I can’t believe a word that pops out of your pretty little lips. I realize that keeping my distance from you is for the best, but for some fucked up reason, I still miss you like crazy.

We had fun together. 

Sure, you drove me mad by sending mixed signals, where you acted like my best buddy one day and then shut me out the next day. But when we were actually together, sitting side-by-side with no one else in the room to distract us, we had an amazing time. I was able to make you laugh with my never-ending train of stories, and you were able to make me feel attractive with your longing looks and hardcore compliments. We made the perfect pair, depending on the day.

We had serious chemistry.

We might not have had any trust or open communication, but we had a shitload of sexual tension. When we were lucky enough to be left alone, we couldn’t go a minute without play fighting or cuddling or kissing. And if there were people around, if it was inappropriate for us to give into our desires, our eyes would say what our bodies couldn’t. Our eye fucking had an intensity that real sex sometimes lacks.

You’re hot as hell. 

Your personality leaves something to be desired, but your looks? Pure perfection. I can’t stop thinking about running my hands through the softness of your hair or feeling your expert fingers massage my shoulders. Of course, that’s nothing compared to how much I miss the sugary taste of your lips. You might not have been blessed with the best personality, but nature gave you the looks and the lip locking skills to make up for it. 

You’re actually a pretty good guy.

You suck at being a friend and you’re even worse at being a boyfriend, but you’re a good person, deep down. You have a huge heart, but you just aren’t sure how to use it. Even though you weren’t able to commit yourself to me and treat me the way I deserve to be treated, you made me happy for a short time, and I can’t thank you enough for that. It’s not a lot, but at least it’s something. It’s better than what some of my other exes have done for me.

You gave me something to look forward to.

I shouldn’t have been excited to get something as simple as a text from you, but whenever I did, it made my entire day. On the rare occasions when you actually made plans to see me, the excitement grew even stronger. Just the thought of seeing you sent butterflies through my stomach and chills into my thighs. I enjoyed the anticipation that came along with loving you.

My feelings for you are complicated. 

Maybe I miss you, because I have horrible taste in men. Maybe I miss you, because I’m lonely, and there aren’t any other good guys around to daydream about. Maybe I miss you, because I really thought I had a chance with you, and I’m thinking about what could’ve been more than I’m thinking about what actually was. Or maybe I’m just out of my mind. I’m not sure why I feel how I feel. All I know is that you’re someone I shouldn’t miss, but for some reason, I can’t shake your name from my mind.