Here’s Exactly What Would Happen To You In A Horror Movie, Based On Your Hogwarts House
Set the Sorting Hat on your heads, kids, because it's time to find out whether your Hogwarts House would survive the terrifying situation of living through a horror movie.
By M.J. Pack
Gryffindor
Known for their bravery, Gryffindors are going one of two ways:
A) The one who can stay silent, hand clapped over their mouth as they lie hidden just inches from the murderer. Once the murderer leaves the room, they take that terrifying chance and bolt out of the house, running on pure adrenaline until they are able to either find help or lead the killer to their doom.
B) The idiot who walks right into the killer’s clutches within the first few minutes of the movie because they didn’t have enough sense to be scared when all the lights go out in the house and they hear a noise.
Slytherin
Let’s face it, Slytherins are going to survive. They will always be the Final Girl/Guy because they’re out for number one. There are scenarios where their cunning ways will actually make them the hero because they’re able to outsmart the killer and save everyone, but there are more likely scenarios where they will trip anyone within five feet of them in order to save themselves. Hey, ambition will get you a long way.
Hufflepuff
Just because they’re the kinder house doesn’t mean Hufflepuffs are any weaker than the rest of the houses. However, their loyalty will be their downfall — they’ll be taken out in the second act in an honorable event of self-sacrifice. Whether acting as a distraction to the killer to save their friends or throwing themselves in harm’s way for the greater good, Hufflepuffs wouldn’t survive… but their death will definitely bring a tear to your eye.
Ravenclaw
Ravenclaws have a distinct advantage as they’re always thinking, learning, calculating. They’ll be the one who figures out who the killer is, how to defeat the monster, the one bit of information that is needed to end the nightmare. Unfortunately whether they’ll make it out alive is entirely up to fate. They could use their quick wits to survive or be stuck in the wrong place at the wrong time trying to make everything right. Them’s the breaks, kids.