The Roommate And Ex-Friend Who Stabbed Me In The Back

From: Laura Jane Williams
To: The Roommate and Ex-Friend Who Stabbed Me In The Back And Then Turned The Knife
Date: 28/11/13

You,

I’m so incredibly saddened that it has come to this.

We were friends, [name redacted]. I don’t know who the person writing these emails is. She isn’t the girl I told my secrets to. She isn’t the girl whose family I stayed with, wearing her mother’s jumper for a walk in the woods where you keep your horses, eating ice cream from cones and laughing as it dripped down our fingers.

I don’t know the girl whose father told me how much he enjoyed my company “despite how things have gotten a bit sticky in the flat.” The girl I laughed with. Remember that night at the power ballad disco? When we ran and leaped and rolled in circles around the dance floor, not giving one single fuck about who was watching and what they were thinking or whether or not they found us “attractive”? Or when we went to the dessert club and had three courses of puddings, each one more gluttonous than the next, and I accidentally had too much prosecco before the last course and fell asleep in my chair for a minute when you went to the bathroom?

The girl behind these emails is a stranger to me. She is most certainly not the person who offered her bed, her time, her hospitality to me because I needed it. For nothing. To be a friend. You’re so very cold, now. The change is chilling, and it had broken my heart in a way no man ever could. I loved you, ex-friend.

I will never understand why you suddenly decided you must have cash from me. If I hurt you so much by needing to leave our house, by needing to find somewhere else to live, then why choose money to punish me? What a funny thing to care about.

Have it. Take it. Enjoy it.

But know this: it is blood money. You’ve tricked me into this, bullied me, and if the price to never have to deal with you again is £350 I’d pay it fifty times over. You’ve poisoned me, and enjoyed doing so.

I wish you love, and light, and I know you are not a terrible human being – not really. Despite the fact that the way you have treated me has been abhorrent – both today’s transaction, and the horrible things you said to me this month face to face – I do, in fact, forgive you. I would not wish your behaviour on my worst enemy though. I hope your future housemates, and other friends, never have to see this side of you. It has floored me. I never imagined that I could do deeply wound somebody – totally by accident, absolutely without intention – that they would lash out like this. So irrationally. So mean.

I hope you find peace within yourself, [name redacted].

Please don’t ever contact me, or my friends, again. This is over, now.

Laura.