10 ‘Harry Potter’ Spinoffs That Should Definitely Happen
1. I Solemnly Swear I’m Up To No Good
Fresh off discovering that one of their friends is actually a werewolf, a group of four troublemakers embark some howlin’ mad adventures — with the help of a secret map, that seems to encourage bad behavior.
Potential Episode: Remus has finally met a girl he likes, but she’s scheduled their next date on the full moon. Sirius sends Wormtail to Professor Sprout’s Greenhouse, in hopes of scoring some Wizard Adderall.
2. Stupefied!
Quirinus Quirrell, Gilderoy Lockart, Remus Lupin, Alastor Moody, Bartemius Crouch Jr., Dolores Umbridge, Severus Snape, and that last one who nobody cares about because we weren’t at Hogwarts, live in a house together for 30 days. The person who Stupefies the most other members will be awarded a 5 year contract to teach Defense Against the Dark Arts. In this no-holds-barred battle for contrived wizarding supremacy, no one is safe.
Potential Episode: For a two day period, contestants are divided into duos who must work together to Stupefy! the others. Snape is paired with Lockhart.
3. HERB-ology with Neville Longbottom
Neville Longbottom interviews all the movers and shakers in Wizarding pop-culture in a Greenhouse that emphasizes the HERB aspect of Herbology.
Potential Episode: Neville interviews everyone from The Weird Sisters, to Viktor Krum, to Stubby Boardman.
4. You Got McGonagall’ed
Game show contestants compete for Galleons and eternal bragging rights in this elimination-style show hosted Minerva McGonagall. When contestants are ousted from competition, the audience shames them with the now-famous YOU! GOT! MCGONAGALL’ED! Minvera will then serve up one of her classic putdowns.
Potential Episode: Contestants must turn Ravens into Cabinets, Thinkpieces on Tinder into things someone actually wants to read, etc.
5. Ministry and Recreation
Despite the fact that they all have magical powers, the folks at this government organization poke fun at the bureaucratic restrictions and other funny realities of working a government job.
Potential Episode: Mafalda Hopkirk must convince a KISS-obsessed muggle family that the hover charm they accidentally witnessed was actually just a message from Gene Simmons. Arthur Weasley tries to make a coffee cup slap him in the face, assuming it’ll get him to focus better in the morning.
6. Marvolo
A fascinating period piece, and look into the lives of one of Hogwarts most brilliant — and darkly mysterious — students.
Potential Episode: Tom Riddle seeks to gain entry to the restricted section of the library. Meanwhile, the walls of Hogwarts continue to send him strange, enticing messages.
7. The Joke Shop
Two zany brothers must balance their penchant for wild and crazy tom-foolery with the reality of running a business.
Potential Episode: Drabus Flulenor, the Weasley’s landlord, raises the rent due to rapid gentrification in Diagon Alley. Fred and George seek to simulate a meth lab within the joke shop, so that Mr. Flulenor will be unable to attract future tenants to the property.
8. Three Cheers And A Butterbeer
This PBS-style miniseries will delve into the true story of how one inn became the defacto watering hole for the Wizarding World’s most revered and powerful.
Potential Episode: Everyone from Madam Rosmerta to Rubeus Hagrid will be interviewed about everything Three Broomsticks — from when Dementors began patrolling Hogsmeade, to the bar’s relationship with rival village bar Hog’s Head.
9. Kreachers Of Habit (Animated Series)
Two misanthropic roommates — whose disdain for humanity is only outdone by their disdain for each other — must get along when they’re both put under house arrest.
Potential Episode: Sirius wants to dispose of a number of family heirlooms that remind him of his unpleasant upbringing. Kreacher, having grown attached, does his best to sabotage.
10. D.E.O.T.C
D.E.O.T.C. is an anthology series that focuses on the social aspect of the extremist, pureblood-obsessed terrorist organization commonly referred to as “The Death Eaters.” D.E..O.T.C, which stands for Death Eaters Off The Clock will focus on what members of the group do when they’re not trying to bend the wizarding world to their will or murder a 17 year-old boy.
Potential Episode: The Dark Lord, who suffers from extreme social anxiety, must work up the courage to ask Alecto Carrow to be his plus-one for the Death Eater Holiday Party.
