How Others See You Depends On How You See Yourself

We live in a world where it matters what others think about you. As a recent college graduate on what feels like a never ending job search for a career that I am not only qualified for, but actually interested in, I have discovered that it really does matter how other people see you. In coming across these harsh yet true realizations, it is important to remember that whatever desirable quality you want people to see on your surface, you have to be able to recognize it within yourself first.

Be confident

Getting others to believe in you, starts with you believing in yourself. Why would someone else believe in your greatness if not even you can see it? This doesn’t mean walk the earth like you’re a God. This means be confident in your strengths but know your weaknesses.

The people who tell you that you can’t

Don’t question your passion; follow it. There are going to be people who undermine your abilities and talents, people who tell you that you’re just not good enough, not right for the job, not right for the field. As long as you believe that you can, nothing should stop you from pushing forward past those who tell you, you can’t.

Fail and fail again

Don’t be discouraged by what others characterize as failure. Use their characterizations of failure as constructive criticism to make you better. Don’t confirm the doubts that others may have about your dreams; prove them wrong. You’re not going to succeed at everything the first time you try it. It’s okay to fail if you use it as motivation to try again.

Know who you are

What others think might matter, especially when it comes to the working world and trying to find a job, but if you stay true to who you are then what others think won’t matter as much because it will be true. A cat wouldn’t try to be a dog, and if it did others would think that cat was crazy. But if a cat just wants to be a cat, (that may or may not be a song in a Disney movie) then others will see the cat for exactly what it is, a cat. So know who you are, and be who you are. Those who appreciate you for all of your commendable qualities will appreciate you for all of your quirky weirdness as well.

When nerves get the best of you

Meeting new people is terribly nerve wrecking. Whether you say weird things that make no sense, nervously shake your leg as if it were not attached to your body, or find it awkward to make eye contact so you stare directly into someone’s nostrils. We all have moments where we get nervous and it prevents us from being our normal, comfortable selves, so don’t cringe and continuously over think about these awkward times. Instead, learn to harness that nervous energy to calm yourself down. Of course, easier said than done. It takes practice. Put yourself in uncomfortable situations. Meet new people, start a conversation with the stranger in front of you waiting for coffee, say something to the person standing across from you in the elevator. Do things you normally wouldn’t do, things that are out of your comfort zone. This way, when you’re in a nerve-wrecking or slightly uncomfortable situation, it won’t seem as nerve wrecking or uncomfortable because you’re used to various types of situations with various types of people.

So what are you waiting for? The world is full of opportunities Go out, be you, and don’t be afraid to fail. People don’t get anywhere by standing still. Make the move.