23 Thoughts You Have When You Shop At H&M
"Am I doing something wrong with my life because I'm not shopping in the corporate business suiting section?"
By 
Ella Ceron
1. “Oh, look, they’ve gotten another mega-supermodel for their current campaign.”
2. “I’ll never be able to wear what she’s wearing. I mean, she’s a supermodel.”
3. “I mean, maybe…? Maybe the maxi-dress.”
4. “Wait. Since when did H&M get so expensive?!”
5. “$150 for a dress? At H&M? Like, this here H&M I am in right now?! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAALKJDFLKDJFAHAHAHA.”
6. “… It is kind of cute, though. Maybe when it goes on sale.”
7. “If I ever spend more than $60 on a single piece of clothing here, so help me God.”
8. “$20 pants, YUSSSSSS.”
9. “Maybe I should just get that T-shirt in one in every color. Streamline it. Minimize it. A uniform, with rotating colors. I could be a clothing chameleon!”
10. “$5 cotton v-neck? WELP, I’mma need me 7 of these.”
11. *waits in an eNdLeSs line for the dressing room*
12. “Hold up. There is no way these pants are cut right. That’s a mislabel. Miss? Miss? This isn’t an 8, is it?”
13. “God, working at H&M is the 9th circle of hell.” (This is primarily thought while smashing sweater hanger back into overcrowded hanger rack, causing the sweater to fall to the floor.)
14. “Am I doing something wrong with my life because I’m not shopping in the corporate business suiting section?”
15. “Am I doing something wrong with my life because I’m not matching my underwear to the corresponding frilly push-up bra?”
16. “Am I doing something wrong because I don’t find this weird black-and-neon-pink abstract pattern cute?!!?”
17. “Why the hell am I here, none of this is really like, cute cute. I’m just shopping for the sake of shopping, right?”
18. “Ohmigod but no, wait, I can make that werq.”
19. “Do I really need these heels? I mean, they’re only $40, but am I even going to be able to WALK in them?”
20. “Do I really need $12 sneakers?”
21. “Wait, but I do need socks.” *loads up on 3 5-packs of peds in the little fun-buy bins they conveniently place next to the registers*
22. *waits in checkout line FoReVeR*
23. “Oh, wait. I needed a dress for my aunt’s wedding. Crap. Guess I’ll have to come back next week. Maybe they’ll have a cute little midi skirt by then. My life would definitely start to go right if I had one of those.” 
