17 Signs You’re An NYC Newb
1. You refer to any city other than New York as “the city”.
2. You pronounce Houston street like the city in Texas.
3. You think that a lawn in Central Park—or any grassy knoll in the city, for that matter—is clean enough to lie on without a towel.
4. You want to go to Times Square for New Years.
5. You take gypsy cabs.
6. You think that Carrie Bradshaw’s life as a freelance writer with copious numbers of Manolo Blahnik shoes is realistic.
7. Your idea of Brooklyn is current-day Williamsburg.
8. You believe downtown NYC is one entity, representing everything cool. (RE: Greenwich village, Union Square, etc).
9. You think of Grand Central Station as a tourist site and not as a cauldron of filth.
10. On Halloween, you partake in the parade.
11. You don’t know that a cab is open when—AND ONLY WHEN—the middle light on the top of the cab is lit up.
12. You engage in a conversation with anyone on the subway past 11pm.
13. You take a Pedicab while bearing a shit-eating grin.
14. You eat a hot dog from a cart.
15. You go to a Broadway show and are talked into having dinner somewhere nearby, like Blue Fin.
16. You buy knock-offs on Canal Street.
17. You think going swimming in a public pool is a good idea—namely, McCarren pool.