30 Hilarious Mindy Kaling Tweets That Will Make Your Day
Fact: I only have Twitter just to follow Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling). Although Kaling stars in her own wonderfully funny sitcom and is a bestselling author, these tweets prove that Kaling also rules the interwebs. To paraphrase Beyonce, who run the world? Mindy Kaling. 
I wish Taylor Swift and I were the youngest and oldest sisters, respectively, of a large Jane Austen-y type family
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) January 6, 2013
Ok Walking Dead is about running zombies so that’s kind of scary and misleading
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) June 21, 2013
Girls like Spock cuz Spock’s like “logically I should not feel love” and we’re all like “oh yes you will, you little hot Vulcan bastard.”
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) May 22, 2013
this whole foods frozen indian tv dinner i just ate is terrible, why did I never learn to cook the cuisine of my ancestors
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) March 24, 2013
I wish I had never heard Crazy In Love and it came out for the first time this morning
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) June 19, 2013
Are you good at making breakfast sandwiches? If so, let’s get married.
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) February 24, 2013
my huevos rancheros was not great but even not great huevos rancheros is the best meal of my life
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) March 20, 2013
Watching Anna Karenina on the plane without headphones. I guess she DOESN’T like being married to Jude Law? this movie is sci-fi/messed up
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) April 28, 2013
If I were a dentist I’d “Another day, another molar.”making eye contact with the hygienist and they would know i wanted to start an affair
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) January 2, 2013
Sometimes you’re Marcus Aurelius sometimes you’re Caligula and its a Caligula night nah mean
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) March 24, 2013
“I like my women like a Niemeyer house; modern but shapely.”
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) March 24, 2013
there doesnt seem to be enough electricity in all of new york city to charge my iPhone for more then 45 minutes — Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) May 14, 2013
In LA if you swim at a pool party you have psychological problems
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) May 28, 2013
Who do I check with to make sure I’m Leaning In?
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) May 3, 2013
“I hope I use these stamps before the price of stamps goes up.” I say, boringly, looking around hopeful to see if anyone says “me too!”
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) April 28, 2013
Lets not forget that before Helena Bonham Carter played a charismatic wretch in every movie she banged Brad Pitt & Ed Norton in Fight Club
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) March 26, 2013
Girls, the lesson is, create a tv show and use it as your reason for needing emails and phone numbers. Like Seth Rogen and Kevin Reilly, say
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) February 6, 2013
I try to be drunk and serene
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) April 28, 2013
I think I was the only person who ate food at the bbq I was at today – and I’m fine with that – I just want everyone to know that I know.
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) May 28, 2013
my inability to type quickly on my iPhone combined with no time has made my communication so curt and direct, it seems like I hate everyone
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) April 10, 2013
If I’m being totally honest with myself, “Space Ghost Coast to Coast” is my favorite TV show of all time
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) February 11, 2013
What does daft punk look like under their helmets, how do I find out
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) May 31, 2013
If I were a dentist I’d “Another day, another molar.”making eye contact with the hygienist and they would know i wanted to start an affair
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) January 2, 2013
I like to think I’m Emma from Jane Austen’s Emma but really I’m a meddler widow from a Sheridan play
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) June 27, 2013
Some people are so lucky they have avocado or orange trees in their yards and they don’t even care
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) May 31, 2013
Whatever, now I’m gonna eat Ethiopian food with college pals CUZ THAT’S WHAT PEOPLE WITH BACHELOR DEGREES DO
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) January 27, 2013
In other news I hate those zombies pulling down the helicopter in the World War Z poster. Get a life zombies
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) June 5, 2013
The problem w being an adult is you meet all these cool new people & you’re like “why can’t we go back in time and go to college together?!”
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) June 10, 2013
On the Super Bowl blackout:
I found the blackout charming. Think of all the meet cutes that must’ve happened!
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) February 4, 2013
Quarterback means “the hot one” in football I thought
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) February 4, 2013
Bonus plug:
Don’t be a weirdo, go see #thisistheend this weekend. It’s a little movie about a girl balancing love and work. Just kidding there’s demons
— Mindy Kaling (@mindykaling) June 14, 2013
