Are You Holding Space For Someone Or Creating It?

Do you check in with them? Do they cross your mind often? Do they help you grow in any way?

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two women sitting on wooden dock over body of water
Photo by KaLisa Veer on Unsplash

Everyone always seems to use the phrase “you only live once” as an excuse to do just about anything. It has become an overused expression that has let in opportunity, yet also caused conflict. It is crucial to know deep down if you are using it for good or if you constantly take advantage of how it can affect the ones around you. You can choose to live how you please, but know that your actions will guide everything that comes next.

How can we let someone that we just met have lasting power over our emotions? As if they hold something more meaningful than some space we made room for. Sometimes we will dwell too long, other times we will let in doubt, and we can even feel humiliated, but know it’s all temporary. We can look into something and think it has more reasoning than it actually does, but depending on if you actually want to let it go will determine how long it will remain present. The more it takes over your thoughts, your actions, and how you go about your day will close off everything else that is meant to come your way. You are simply not ready. It takes time to understand we don’t always receive what we work towards. We still may need healing from what we used to work on.

Our observations lead to interactions that will hold purpose for as long we seem fitting. Almost as if they are placeholders for what we are truly after. It will look differently for everyone. Whether it may be adventure, passion, growth, or entertainment, it will all lead to discovery. You may not like the outcome every time, but if you look beyond it you will be able to find more meaning. You will unlock the truth behind how you view yourself and what you are willing to accept.

It usually begins with how you first meet someone and what you have done to nurture the relationship since. That will determine if they will be around for a lifetime or if their company is just momentary. The idea behind holding space for someone versus working in that space can reveal what you are truly looking for. There is no need to waste your time.

Ask yourself some questions that will unfold the reality of your situation and how much value it holds. Do you check in with them? Do they cross your mind often? Do they help you grow in any way? Every answer has its own path; it’s just a matter of when you are willing to face what is right in front of you or if you would rather wait a little longer to see if something changes. Most likely you have it all figured out, but you aren’t one to give up. If things don’t seem clear to you now, then you might want to reflect on why you are at this point to begin with. Sometimes we hold onto the potential of what it could be instead of what it actually is.

If they want to show up, trust me, they will. Beyond all odds, they will find a way to get to you. It may not be in person, it may not even be with one single gesture, but if they sincerely want you, they won’t let anything get in the way. Yes, I know life happens. No one is going to be the ideal human all of the time. However, pay attention to how they make you feel the majority of the time. Do they add to your presence or take away from it? Do they shine with you in your light or dim it? Do they support you fully or only when it benefits them? You will know. We have to realize that we are only guaranteed the time we have right now. Please don’t waste another second walking in the same direction that already led you out.